To be fair, at 24 I’d have said the same thing to my girlfriend about marriage but now I’m 33, 3 years married to her and I’d definitely be a big proponent of marriage. People change as they mature. That said, living together for a significant length of time without considering getting married is a bit suspect.

In terms of “practical or loving”, a loving relationship that isn’t practical isn’t going to last at all.

It’s just not a very funny joke. The joke is basically just an attempt to exploit the fact that the word “therapist” contains the word “rapist”, which isn’t an original observation and other jokes do it much better and even they aren’t particularly funny.

My guess is that he’s gay, he liked you, he is scared he’ll lose all his friends if he comes out so he’s got cold feet and now claims he did it all to humiliate you in an attempt to avoid having to deal with the consequences of coming out to his friends.

Don’t do drugs, kids!