Take the trip without him. Spend three days looking after yourself and examining the relationship as a whole. At the end of it all ask yourself if you are looking forward to seeing him again and going back to how things are between you. Anything other than a definite yes means its time to call it quits.

Relationships can't be 'sunshine and roses around the door' all the time but the overall general vibe should be happy and fulfilled, not frustrated and drained, which sounds liike where you are. It's very possible that you've simply outgrown him and a break might be just the clarity you need to accept that.

First rule: don't fib about how much you enjoyed it and don't fake it. If someone thinks they are hitting all the right buttons because you aren't being truthful about how many they're missing then they'll carry on doing it that way and you won't get the satisfaction you deserve.

Secondly, never have sex out of obligation. If you don't want it, you don't have to do it. Forcing yourself to have sex just to please someone else/keep them around only reinforces any negative associations you already have.

Third your ex is a selfish, lazy tool. His penis is not a magic wand that can make any woman orgasm just by pointing it in her direction. Work on dropping that idea from your mindset because it's created a mental roadblock that you can't get past without help. The truth is that many women have trouble reaching orgasm from penetration alone and need extra mental, emotional and physical stimulation to get their own personal best out of sex. You are not defective, you are not unusual and you are not alone.

Finally knowing how to please yourself and being confident in expressing it to an open and understanding partner will help. Reading Come As You Are by Dr Emily Nagoski might be a helpful starting point for you to begin your explorations. Good luck!

She's looking for any cracks in your relationship that she can exploit, either because she's looking for an affair, thinks she's entitled to his attention or for some other leverage in the workplace.

Top marks to your husband for shutting her down and not taking the bait but he needs to cover his arse with his boss and HR and let it be known with them that her intrusive behaviour is making him uncomfortable.