Submitted by YouAnswerToMe t3_10q6yj7 in Showerthoughts
Comments
FastWalkingShortGuy t1_j6oldrd wrote
But change just one letter...
do0tz t1_j6owwpo wrote
Flashlights and bread daylight?
dragoncop1 t1_j6p5cgl wrote
Edit: I'm got r/woooosh
Original comment - Flesh... You can figure out the rest
IBJON t1_j6paqhm wrote
r/woooosh
dragoncop1 t1_j6pbigw wrote
I just assumed they didn't know what it was
sashaaa123 t1_j6peusr wrote
If they didn't know what it was how could they figure the rest out?
dragoncop1 t1_j6peys9 wrote
Type flesh then the rest of the word I would hope that it would give them the answer
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cheezecake2000 t1_j6pipyk wrote
One of my co-workers came back in the shop with a box left near our break area. As soon as they opened it, everyone knew exactly what it was. Except one person innocently asking what that transparent, silicone thing with lips is. Oh dear.. Please stay the way you are
freekoout t1_j6pbps8 wrote
No it's obviously flashlight in broad DayNight.
dragoncop1 t1_j6pf657 wrote
Of course how could I be so stupid /s
Fuckoffassholes t1_j6pbcha wrote
*Flesh out the rest
RugsbandShrugmyer t1_j6pfo61 wrote
Fleshbroad in flash breadlight
dragoncop1 t1_j6pg0qa wrote
Ah so thats why I got the woooosh, because people couldn't tell what word to finish with God damn I really am a dumbass and I deserve that woooosh /j
RugsbandShrugmyer t1_j6pghcl wrote
Happens to the best of us, and as the best of us, I'd know 😎
dragoncop1 t1_j6phcl5 wrote
Thank you for being so comforting o great one
RugsbandShrugmyer t1_j6phwwx wrote
I'd say "it's the least I can do", but honestly I think it might be the most. Love you.
kylemcg t1_j6omrbw wrote
Teehee.
Frost97872 t1_j6ov7jj wrote
It’s bad that I read it like that first.
travoltaswinkinbhole t1_j6pdhhr wrote
The internet has ruined me because I see flashlight and my mind goes to fleshlight.
Icy-End8895 t1_j6pfk3x wrote
And don’t even get me started on those safelight vans.
Opalescent_Witness t1_j6phtii wrote
Safelight repair, safelight replace!
FortBlocks t1_j6p5h4o wrote
Flashlight in bread daylight??
spanky_rockets t1_j6p9aqt wrote
He’s using a flashlight in brad daylight
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dtwhitecp t1_j6pizco wrote
it took me way too long to figure out you've got fleshlights on the brain, a thing most humans do not ever think of
maruffin t1_j6p81jn wrote
He running around naked in broad daylight.
Cynical_Thinker t1_j6pdlqe wrote
Seeing ghosts in broad daylight perhaps?
banjodance_ontwitter t1_j6o7gm7 wrote
He's trimming the hedges in broad daylight. Sure it sounds like a euphemism, and it could be.
YouAnswerToMe OP t1_j6o89db wrote
I was originally toying with the idea of “if something illegal or unexpected…” but in the end decided to keep it brief.
SteveInMotion t1_j6okjqb wrote
It worked. Well done.
banjodance_ontwitter t1_j6p9erq wrote
I prefer my jokes rare
xpknightx t1_j6pdn4j wrote
A little late for trimming the verge, don’t you think?
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Viewtifultrey3 t1_j6pgpyj wrote
And it looks like the days sure are getting longer, if ya know what I mean.
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namoonara t1_j6orjx6 wrote
Like how no one has tribulations unless there are trials involved
n_bumpo t1_j6p3ka1 wrote
Or being sick without being fatigued
sin-and-love t1_j6pc34o wrote
or zagging without zigging
timsstuff t1_j6pecoj wrote
Whenever I see an accident on the freeway I think to myself "Someone zigged when they should have zagged."
AdmiralAucka t1_j6pdrnl wrote
I went to a hobby store and asked for a kaboodle kit. They didn't have one.
RobotMonkeytron t1_j6pgd00 wrote
My friend wrecked his first car because he zagged when he should have zigged.
ThePr1d3 t1_j6pcmra wrote
Fatigue just mean tiredness in my language. I'm fatigued every night for instance
timegoodaforhere t1_j6pcxti wrote
Fatigued means tired in English too. Dude is just an idiot.
partty1 t1_j6pdr8e wrote
Usually people do use fatigued to distinguish between something like a small cold or a flu. They have similar symptoms but usually a flu is accompanied by fatigue and reduction in strength. It's why fatigue is usually one of the options along side tiredness and muscle aches when describing illnesses to a nurse.
n_bumpo t1_j6pf35f wrote
Yes, but people say “I’m sick and tired” didn’t think I needed to explain to English speakers
Asteroth6 t1_j6pdvvr wrote
I think that one’s just you man.
BorderlineWire t1_j6pivo1 wrote
It’s a U.K. English thing but has nothing to do with being unwell. Sick and tired of next doors noise for example. Fatigue doesn't really fit the saying.
Yellow_Snow_Globe t1_j6pj5j1 wrote
Can’t have nooks without crannies apparently, whatever the fuck crannies are. Use crannies in any sentence by itself
Edit: well, I learned something today
cran·ny /ˈkranē/
noun
plural noun: crannies
a small, narrow space or opening.
Leprechaun_Giant t1_j6pga35 wrote
Nobody is about to make ado about something
Icy-End8895 t1_j6pfraj wrote
Yeah, they go together like lamb and tuna fish.
could_use_a_snack t1_j6ogc4h wrote
Now I'm wondering if there is an opposite to broad daylight. Narrow daylight?
mustichooseausernam3 t1_j6ojjwk wrote
In the wee hours of night, comes to mind?
Mytro93 t1_j6pfoej wrote
Sounds like something a dwarf would say.
Metelex t1_j6pirwy wrote
I think we're onto something here
Halvus_I t1_j6pc5p5 wrote
“But who knows what she spoke to the darkness, alone, in the bitter watches of the night, when all her life seemed shrinking, and the walls of her bower closing in about her, a hutch to trammel some wild thing in?”
HughtBichess t1_j6oqxx5 wrote
Obviously narrow nightdark
generalfrost423 t1_j6p2jho wrote
Narrow Nightdark was my nickname in High School
DigitalDeath12 t1_j6pg96l wrote
How’d you go from narrow nightdark to general frost? Some sort of reverse Darth Vader story or something?
DigitalDeath12 t1_j6pgien wrote
Like you started out evil and then grew up to become a great do-good leader who finds out he has a son from a time he had when he was still evil but really close to becoming good.
generalfrost423 t1_j6pi4yw wrote
My commanding officer, Sliver Shadeshadow, ordered me to kill a village of innocents. That's when I knew I couldn't fight for the empire anymore, and I defected to the rebellion.
Asteroth6 t1_j6pe0so wrote
Narrow Nightdark.
Band name detected.
(Or fantasy character. But is there a difference?)
Standalone2 t1_j6p1l08 wrote
In the dead of night.
quinn_drummer t1_j6p3ltz wrote
Or in the pitch black
ThePr1d3 t1_j6pcp2o wrote
The Hour of the Owl
TommyTuttle t1_j6oud6s wrote
I tried to buy a caboodle but apparently you have to get the kit 💁♂️
TheEarlyStation22 t1_j6p6bm7 wrote
Hahah
I may now start saying “broad daylight” for random things.
“I mowed the lawn in BROAD DAYLIGHT HELEN! BROAD DAYLIGHT!!”
perceptualdissonance t1_j6pe64s wrote
I repeat things for emphasis. Emphasis!
Planedrawn t1_j6oxyt8 wrote
"You scratched my CD! You took it out in broad daylight and SCRATCHED it"
707Guy t1_j6p9von wrote
Was gonna reference this specific crime as well.
20GotoTen t1_j6oev26 wrote
Made me laugh while i was eating. Now i have panini stuck in that bit between my nose and mouth
YouAnswerToMe OP t1_j6of1qf wrote
I believe the medical term is ‘face taint’
AnonPlzzzzzz t1_j6p66r6 wrote
I prefer to call it the gooch.
So, "Face gooch".
Muroid t1_j6p19kb wrote
I’m looking forward to summer when work ends before sunset so my wife and I can go back to committing walks in broad daylight.
MrB996 t1_j6oankf wrote
Wouldn’t daylight already be broad since it covers a very large area?
SteveInMotion t1_j6okw0l wrote
Yes, but nobody ever says that apart from a crime being committed. Which is why OP’s line makes sense.
vmicozzi t1_j6ofyfn wrote
Exactly! Do we have narrow daylight at some point, maybe this is an outdated phrase that needs to go...like pitch black...I don't think I've ever seen pitch
anally_ExpressUrself t1_j6p9ium wrote
We also rarely hear about other sources of broad light. Broad moonlight. Broad candlelight. Broad fluorescent light.
brinazee t1_j6penrm wrote
Re the moon: probably because the only time it's bright enough to be broad is under the full moon, so full moonlight is used instead.
Ok-Software-1902 t1_j6pf7u2 wrote
Just like how the night only becomes dead when people do shady shit then
Jase_86 t1_j6og4nq wrote
Except daylight robbery. I've never heard of that being called broad daylight robbery lol.
maximumfunpriv t1_j6oid98 wrote
Unless a real wise guy does it to a real neat broad, ya see?
Jase_86 t1_j6oj3ta wrote
Hmm. Yes I think you're right.
joethebro96 t1_j6p0j10 wrote
How is it posts like this get up but every single one of mine is killed before it gets up by automod?
YouAnswerToMe OP t1_j6p1965 wrote
Your guess is as good as mine
joethebro96 t1_j6p1jej wrote
Sorry, that was a bit harsher than I meant. My agitation is towards automod.
YouAnswerToMe OP t1_j6p1or1 wrote
Haha it’s all good, we’ve all been there
Showerthoughts_Mod t1_j6o6m0x wrote
This is a friendly reminder to read our rules.
Remember, /r/Showerthoughts is for showerthoughts, not "thoughts had in the shower!"
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GreenLightening5 t1_j6p5g1i wrote
all daylight is broad, i've never seen someone limit daylight to just one spot.
MOUSENEISNER t1_j6p5zo5 wrote
You've never been to FL.
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Sleepy_Membership_ t1_j6o6u5f wrote
That's a pretty dark thought, but at least we can all be thankful that Rytr is here to help us write without any criminal intent!
kylemcg t1_j6o9bxw wrote
Or just doing something that isn't normally done in daylight.
He's using a flashlight in broad daylight.