burgerpizzatacocafe

burgerpizzatacocafe t1_j39hz7d wrote

What about her thighs, those jeans were painted on.

Shut up.

YOU shut up.

"No, all of you. I can't hear myself think."

Oh, look at that!

He wants to think.

Think

Think, think, think. In Pooh bear's thinking corner.

"Oh, bother."

They're not going to believe you, you know.

They can't hear US.

You can't even hear us.

Think.

Hear

CAN'T CAN'T CAN'T

Your mother could hear us. Are you going to tell them about your mother?

Freud told them about your mother.

"Leave my mother out of it. You're the ones who killed her."

No, YOU did that.

You're gonna get the chair.

If you make it out of the room. What's that razor for, buddy?

"I haven't shaved in three weeks."

Maybe you look better with a beard.

Yes, better.

Easier to identify.

Your mom had a beard.

"I said leave her out of it!"

We heard you.

We're always listening.

They won't, though.

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burgerpizzatacocafe t1_j2fgfwq wrote

The Jedi have been engaged in outright genocide for millennia in their attempts to eliminate the Sith, who are the actual force of balance in the galaxy.

The Sith were originally a species that looked like an uglier version of Sebulba with tentacles, who were a race of force-adepts native to Korriban, that could more or less only receive dark side energies due to the natural evolution of the planet. They were a monastic order that originally had zero experience with militaristic warfare. Think evil Hare Krishnas that looked a little like Davy Jones in POTC dipped in dragonsblood ink.

For a real life comparison, the Lama caste of Tibet before the Chinese exile. Torture was commonplace, but all in the name of the middle path.

The Jedi considered them tainted and began a campaign to eliminate them from the galaxy. This order of balance who have always purported themselves to be the good guys blockaded a peaceful planet and either bombarded it with weapons of mass destruction or concentrated their force powers to suffocate it, depending on whose holocron you're holding. All in the name of good. ...I mean, balance. They retconned popular history to make it look like they purged themselves all at once by soaking up too much wickedness.

Before the Jedi purged the planet, it was lush and vibrant, possibly even oceanic like Mon Calamari or Manaan. It is now a desert with a handful of concentrated ruins.

The Jedi are the bad guys in Star Wars. The only fucking true neutral character in canon is Chewbacca. Or maybe Revan.

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