ConvivialKat

ConvivialKat t1_j4d2fvx wrote

Buy yourself a champagne stopper. They clamp on to the rim of the bottle and are pretty strong. Also, find a place to store your champers "partially upright" (leaning a bit is OK) in the fridge.

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ConvivialKat t1_j29wx2t wrote

First you sabotaged yourself in the moment and now you are continuing that sabotage by focusing on regret. I suspect you have also built this person up in your mind, increasing your regret. Because, you only spent a few minutes with the guy, so you really have no idea of who or what he is.

The expression "live and learn" exists for a reason. Move on and try to learn how to better deal with your anxiety.

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ConvivialKat t1_iyfeawb wrote

Yes, but that doesn't make your partner your next of kin. It can make them the executor of your estate if you die, but has no protections if you are still alive. That takes a power of attorney and an advanced Healthcare directive. Not cheap.

ETA: Also Domestic partnerships aren't recognized in many states. This is why gay partners want the right to legally marry.

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ConvivialKat t1_iyf5uik wrote

So, I'm the old person coming in with a reality check for your BF. Marriage IS a social construct, but it also gives each of you some serious legal protections that you will have to spend a lot of money trying to get, when you can get them automatically by legally marrying someone.

When you marry, you become your spouses next of kin. What does that mean? That means that if something happens to either of you, the other is the person who will be accepted by everyone as the person who is in control. If you are next of kin, you are the one who can always be with your partner and can make medical decisions for them if they are unable to do so. If you are NOT next of kin, those decisions are up to your partner's next of kin (likely parents). They could exclude your partner entirely. Everything related to your life and your living scenario will be dependent upon next of kin.

Of course, legal protections can be put into place...a will, an advanced Healthcare directive, a power of attorney...but the COST is extreme compared to the simple action of getting legally married.

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ConvivialKat t1_iuilewe wrote

I'm sorry, OP, but saying that he can't be in a relationship right now and moving out is breaking up. He broke up with you. I'm so sorry. But, you need to accept reality and make plans to move on with your life. Trying to convince yourself there is still hope is only going to hurt you more. Good luck and best wishes to you.

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