Submitted by AsslessBaboon t3_yvwhwo in nottheonion
Comments
AsslessBaboon OP t1_iwgefnr wrote
Just don't miss it!
masterpainimeanbetty t1_iwht7oe wrote
all of those are contingent upon "Find it!"
LeviathanGank t1_iwi54pl wrote
lick it!
andurilmat t1_iwgcyep wrote
Kind of weird choosing a mascot that half the population will be unable to find
ethan_prime t1_iwgxsk3 wrote
Every pitch meeting needs to have someone with a dirty mind to tell people when something looks even mildly inappropriate.
Gizshot t1_iwhy2s6 wrote
My gf thinking of kids names and I'm sitting there with my idiot brain coming up with insults or jokes for everyone of them, told her she can have a name if I can't make fun of it in less than a minute
kpmelomane21 t1_iwi29o1 wrote
That is exactly what you need to be doing. Kids are creative, and mean. You also need to consider initials because my friend was gonna name her son Andrew with a middle name Scott and their last name starts with S...
AnyImpression6 t1_iwslwo3 wrote
On the plus side, he'd have the high score at every arcade.
joshhupp t1_iwi08r2 wrote
Lol that's how we settled on kids names too
AOCismydomme t1_iwjkw6t wrote
[deleted] t1_iwpija4 wrote
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akio3 t1_iwhg32f wrote
It’s useless, though, if no one listens to them:
FreddieDoes40k t1_ixo5sfp wrote
We're on the same wavelength because my mind immediately snapped to that sketch.
Ukabe t1_iwhayet wrote
They knew it already.
koei19 t1_iwhwc6d wrote
False. Nobody actually knows what a clitoris looks like.
MediumToblerone t1_iwir37o wrote
There’s literally no way to know what they look like.
thatswherethedevilis t1_iwjqg9e wrote
Pfft. As if they even exist.
OsamaBinNoodles t1_iwkl34k wrote
I got reprimanded at my internship for “sexually harassing” someone. Our boss was telling us about how they were creating a new initiative titled BBC. At lunch, with the other interns, I told one of my male friends about how bad an idea this was and how people will make fun of it. We started laughing and a female intern asked what we were laughing about. I told her. Next day I am asked to go to our bosses office. He tells me the female intern complained to him that I made sexual comments to her. So, I had to apologize to her and the other female interns. Anyways…they didn’t listen to me and the city got some good memes out of it.
[deleted] t1_iwgylqf wrote
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bluebook21 t1_iwjxaoy wrote
And we will call them "teenagers"
IndianaNetworkAdmin t1_iwhjtrf wrote
PSA: If your clitoris is the size of a small vehicle, red, and has eyeballs, please seek medical attention.
Sad-Row8676 t1_iwhus2k wrote
Don't body shame! /s
FindTheRemnant t1_iwgy09k wrote
Looks like a triangle to me
LexLuthorJr t1_iwgq99n wrote
Should we even keep doing Olympic mascots? Every time they just get criticized for this, that, or the other reason.
Photodan24 t1_iwgtj3t wrote
It all about selling merch.
willengineer4beer t1_iwjhlou wrote
Secondary merch even!
Like my favorite aging version of my hometown’s Olympic mascot.
passwordsarehard_3 t1_iwgwgfg wrote
Better question is should we keep the Olympics. I love the spirit but everything I hear about it reeks of corruption and graft.
LoveArguingPolitics t1_iwgxuq5 wrote
They need to build like four permanent facilities and stop moving out around the country.
Especially when it goes to an underdeveloped nation the facilities end up crumbling as they can't be supported and during the event they have to starve the populace to have enough money to throw the events
Sir_Penguin21 t1_iwhr770 wrote
Send it back to Greece.
somegurl408 t1_iwi1ryz wrote
And bring back olive oil wraslin'!!!
thatswherethedevilis t1_iwjqkkp wrote
Bring back the nudity!
MediumToblerone t1_iwirbgn wrote
Where else are we going to hold the hot people orgy?
GoldenRamoth t1_iwjfgl4 wrote
There's no film.
Vids or it doesn't happen.
Broomstick73 t1_iwhn5xr wrote
I mean….sports in general?
cassiclock t1_iwi93hl wrote
I mean yes because I needed this in my life. It's hilarious
passwordsarehard_3 t1_iwgw3jl wrote
Somalia immediately demands the new mascots be cut out of the games.
Electrical_Ingenuity t1_iwkwu7e wrote
Ugh.
mr_oof t1_iwgwkcc wrote
MessrMonsieur t1_iwgx495 wrote
Why was I expecting an anatomically correct clitoris model when I clicked that
punksmostlydead t1_iwhj67u wrote
There's plenty of subreddits for this, should you require.
[deleted] t1_iwgyezi wrote
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EquivalentInflation t1_iwhw48a wrote
> Shuss, a little man on skis, was created in a hurry ahead of the 1968 Games in Grenoble. His designer had just one night to prepare a plan for submission.
I’ve never related to anything more in my life.
“When is this due? Tomorrow?!? Fuck it, unipod on a ski.”
rklab t1_iwhs6g1 wrote
Bring back Schneemandl
Shabster0 t1_iwgfvn2 wrote
“at last understood what one looks like”…. that is not at all what a clit looks like what? Is there something i’m missing?
coleslawww307 t1_iwgne1u wrote
Look up the clit + its internal structure. Looks exactly the same. Not a lot of people realize the clit is way bigger than it looks
Shabster0 t1_iwgty1n wrote
Omg i’m so dumb I didn’t even consider internal 😭😭 thank you
OldBob10 t1_iwha5az wrote
You’re missing the obvious fact that the people who are complaining couldn’t find a clit if given a flashlight and a map.
AsslessBaboon OP t1_iwgc2bd wrote
>The Paris organising committee said it was an opportunity to “embody the French spirit by offering something new” in a break from the traditional animal figure often chosen for the Olympics.
Oh France. Never stop being you. Paris sera toujours Paris
mr_oof t1_iwgvxvm wrote
diacewrb t1_iwgdkzv wrote
It is clearly a pair of flamin hot doritos.
OldBob10 t1_iwh9qdp wrote
Now *that* is a tasty answer!
diablosinmusica t1_iwhfo3s wrote
Do not mix the two.
_Face t1_iwiu619 wrote
Doritos 3D
BRAUforce t1_iwgf68m wrote
>But in the inevitable social media debate around the clitoris-shaped mascots, one secondary school teacher said their simplistic triangular design could reinforce society's vague notion of the under-discussed part of the female anatomy, suggesting biology teachers be brought in to redesign them
Wait, wut?
ash_274 t1_iwgj2h5 wrote
They’re supposed to be hats.
Some people on social media say, “you know, they kind of look like a clitoris” and this teacher responded, “well, it should be redesigned to look more anatomically correct”
They’re anthropomorphized hats.
PermanentTrainDamage t1_iwh6u89 wrote
If the French are going to pick a hat to represent them, wouldn't the beret be more iconic?
ash_274 t1_iwhrv71 wrote
They looked at their history and asked themselves, "What were the people wearing when they were lopping off bourgeoisie heads?"
cassiclock t1_iwi9ali wrote
The last time the people were truly happy. Feels like a warning and I love it
ididntunderstandyou t1_iwjcdjf wrote
No, one of the main symbols of France is La Marianne - meant to be the allegory of the French Republic, the democracy that followed the revolution. Most paintings of the revolution have her in it. And she wears that red peasant’s hat. The beret is a stereotype, sure. But has no meaning in France.
AUniquePerspective t1_iwkoto8 wrote
La Mariane always has her tits out which is why so many people haven't noticed her hat.
Broomstick73 t1_iwholbh wrote
LMFAO!!!
superfluous_t t1_iwh0gkg wrote
These should be changed - I can envisage a queue of men in the gift shop getting frustrated because they can’t find it
AsslessBaboon OP t1_iwh16yc wrote
If the comments here are to believed. Am inclined to believe you
Marigwenn t1_iwgu6fm wrote
I hope it’s intentional. I love it.
Meanderingversion t1_iwh5fhy wrote
I've You've never found one before, you'd have to use some imagination as well!
haladura t1_iwhxu8z wrote
They look happy.
daverapp t1_iwi5wr9 wrote
I misread the title as just, "Clitoris Trainer"
And I was like, "Where can I find such a product?"
WAJGK t1_iwihlgm wrote
Nah these are great
barrymccockner76 t1_iwh60eu wrote
Can someone explain to me why the Olympics has to even have mascots? I've never understood it.
mjsallie t1_iwhsw6n wrote
$€£¥₩
JesseB342 t1_iwit6m7 wrote
Considering these look nothing like a clitoris that’s just further proof that most guys know absolutely nothing about female anatomy.
zeolus123 t1_iwj8ecs wrote
Everyone knows the clitoris is a myth.
PaintedLady5519 t1_iwjc23k wrote
Looks like a red samosa to me
lcbzoey t1_iwh547r wrote
Wow! This is the WORST thing about the Olympics, surely! this FIASCO of a mascot is the true black mark on the history of the Olympic games. (Surely)
HR_DUCK t1_iwhh1yi wrote
Did a guy write this? How does he know what it looks like? /s
WirelessBCupSupport t1_iwhsws5 wrote
Liberty wore a red clit scarf hat thing!
(I'd post link to the image but she's topless and rather NSFW in the original painting)
theguineapigssong t1_iwjfeuu wrote
R/theyknew
Future-Agent t1_iwjkg8z wrote
I have no words.
wabashcanonball t1_iwjnh41 wrote
Free the clitoris—faster, higher, stronger!!!
Alystan2 t1_iwjr5kt wrote
Great! The Eiffel Tower is going from being a phallic to a femininity symbol!
AP825 t1_iwjvhqt wrote
A whole group of men reviewed the design but oddly none of them could see it
zubaz69 t1_iwu5u5d wrote
Leave it the French
devinsharp t1_iwh29vf wrote
I think we can all agree we should just go back to the 2004 Summer Olympics mascot
cn45 t1_iwhstg0 wrote
Don’t look at me I voted for springy.
phred_666 t1_iwhb0kc wrote
What? They can’t find them to see what they look like.
[deleted] t1_iwhg0lo wrote
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[deleted] t1_iwhj8lc wrote
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[deleted] t1_iwi25q6 wrote
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Aun_El_Zen t1_iwj9tgr wrote
I've got a dirty mind, and I don't see it
blakewoolbright t1_iwjeta7 wrote
If that is a clitoris, so is togakiss.
strangway t1_iwkjet3 wrote
There are men so blind to the clitoris that would stare blankly at these and act like a host on Westworld looking at a modern photograph
McMacAttack35 t1_iwjf2me wrote
Twitter and media really be reaching nowadays
KikiStLouie t1_iwjuqw0 wrote
It would be nice if things could just be a shape. Not everything has to be dirty, sexual, or a double entendres.
[deleted] t1_iwgkruj wrote
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OldBob10 t1_iwh9kha wrote
Even assuming you accept the desire of the committee to “embody the French spirit by offering something new”, this is still reaching back further into the past than the Eiffel Tower. Also, the Phrygian cap is historically associated with The Terror. You know, show trials, “the national razor”, beheadings, etc. Great publicity..!
I mean, if they wanted to dip into “the heroic past” they could have gone with an image of Charlemagne. Yeah - whatever happened to that guy..? 😊
Raistline1 t1_iwgh44v wrote
Makes perfect sense. Like the Olympics, no one ever gives a shit where the clitoris is anymore.
coleslawww307 t1_iwgnmca wrote
Why would you self own like this?
Raistline1 t1_iwgvi4p wrote
They ruin cities in which they are held. Often times people are forced to move to make room for venues that are never to be used again. The athletes are not well compensated and if they do not give a perfect performance could face financial ruin for representing their country. There is an unneeded burden put on the local environment and is just a major scam at this point. Most people don't even care anymore, which is evident in the viewership of the 2020 Olympics being dropped by half of that of 2016. So yeah, I'll don't give a shit where the Olympics are.
AsslessBaboon OP t1_iwgyxmp wrote
Cool. but why don't you care where the clit is at?
Raistline1 t1_iwh45ie wrote
I don't have one, nor do I wish to own one.
[deleted] t1_iwh4nec wrote
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Beginning-Abalone-58 t1_iwgrs8y wrote
r/suicidebywords
V12Jaguar t1_iwge2r1 wrote
Flick it! Twist it! Bop it!