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justinbl4ck t1_iu6436x wrote

My father in law has dementia but is still lucid enough a lot of the time to tell us about it. He said the other day, "It's a weird deal. I can be sitting at my kitchen table and all of a sudden it's my kitchen table from 1975 and everything is 1975."

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-et37- t1_iu6aok7 wrote

Well that’s terrifying.

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Malfrum t1_iu6c79n wrote

This is exactly how it was with my grandmother. It was like her mind was unmoored in time. Some days she would be confused because she thought I should be a little kid; other days, she mistook me for a friend of hers she hadn't seen since the 50's

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justinbl4ck t1_iu6cs0b wrote

Yep, that's him. He thinks my wife(his daughter) is his wife. He thinks my oldest son is his oldest son often.

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schmales t1_iu6flao wrote

My grandmother is the same, I look exactly like my mom but with red hair and she asked me the other day when I dyed my hair and if I was still dating [my dad].

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Viltris t1_iu6fqzg wrote

You've inspired me to start a journal. The cover of the journal will say "You probably have dementia. Read this to help you remember all your loved ones."

Demented me will probably look at the journal and be like "What is this nonsense" and throw it away though...

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OpportunitySure9578 t1_iu63va0 wrote

I love how more and more people are thinking about reincarnation…in the shower…it’s great. But this is off path.

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tpb772000 OP t1_iu64hd7 wrote

I was actually driving and talking to my friend about his aunt who just got dementia. She is Indian and believes in reincarnation and I was trying to be there for her.

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OpportunitySure9578 t1_iu65co5 wrote

It’s a nice thought, no one really knows

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XOundercover t1_iu69u2j wrote

no it's not

im scared, i don'tknow what's going to happen when I die

and the scariest part is that the most likely thing to happen is instand nothing.

not even black. no thoughts. just nothing.

that scares the shit outta me

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pixlplayer t1_iu6d0zy wrote

I find it comforting. Eventually all of this will be over. The concept of heaven is what’s terrifying. Never being able to die, living into infinity? No thanks

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JumpFew6622 t1_iu6m22h wrote

That’s why reincarnation would be the perfect scenario! You live for eternity you just don’t know it! Of course that same logic applies the other way too, you’ll be dead forever but don’t worry because you won’t even know it! Aghhhhh😠

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Rednaxella_ t1_iu6c09n wrote

If there's really nothing after death, you don't need to be scared :D

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trey3rd t1_iu6hd7i wrote

But I want to exist.

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Rednaxella_ t1_iu6hnsj wrote

You can't know that, maybe not existing is better than existing.

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trey3rd t1_iu6i5ab wrote

The fuck I can't. I've already done both. I know that I prefer existence to non existence.

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Rednaxella_ t1_iu6ifrg wrote

How tf you did both?

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trey3rd t1_iu6iuza wrote

Well you see, there was roughly 14 billion years before I was born that I didn't exist. Then I was born and now I do exist.

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Rednaxella_ t1_iu6j02o wrote

Ok, and what do you remember from those 14bil years?

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trey3rd t1_iu6jfn6 wrote

Do you not understand what existence is?

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Rednaxella_ t1_iu6jj5n wrote

Not really, now answer please

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trey3rd t1_iu6k2ej wrote

I'm sorry, you're going to have to go talk to your parents or guardian about life and death and the concepts of existence. It's not a topic that I believe you should learn about from a stranger on the Internet.

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Rednaxella_ t1_iu8nsnk wrote

That was a joke.. But rly, you can't know if it's better to exist because you could not exist and still be "alive" in some energy state or idk. We know actually nothing about how universe works, so perception of these things is usually relative to person. Only death is probably the same for everyone

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who519 t1_iu6i7yd wrote

Alright XO, I have some good news for you, consciousness studies are getting really interesting and their is actually serious inquiries into the possibility of the survival of consciousness post mortem. Look up Bruce Greyson and Sam Parnia as two good starters. There is a ton of woo and fake shit around life after death as well, most of the people peddling this shit are trying to sell books, looking at you Eben Alexander. In the end as pointed out above, none of us know, either way...we aren't dead yet.

Here are some links that may help...

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who519 t1_iu6gltm wrote

Kudos for pointing out nobody really knows. So many on reddit think they have it all figured out, one way or the other. The only certainty in life is uncertainty.

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ICrayMcSlay t1_iu647x5 wrote

If anything dementia is an argument against reincarnation because it supports an individual's personality and behaviour being entirely dependent on their physical brains.

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randomofrandoms1 t1_iu6gvfb wrote

Then could dementia arguably then be time travel for them or a 4th dimensional drifting of the mind?

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seamonkey420 t1_iu6eenz wrote

no it isn't. not even close. OP hasnt dealt with dementia it appears.

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ILIKERED_1 t1_iu6g2ia wrote

My mother has LBD. This take is so off the plot, Michael Bay is about to drop in an explosion.

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Bad_but_Learning t1_iu68grq wrote

There is no way to prove that reincarnation is real, and making assumptions without using a factual foundation leads to illogical and fallacious thinking/conclusions. Let alone saying that dementia, which has over 400 types, is "premature reincarnation", as each type varies in severity and symptom. Definitely an interesting idea, not bashing that, but I would have left 'assumption' and 'is likely' out of the equation.

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whenwillitbenow t1_iu6dyq2 wrote

There’s to way to prove anything after death is real. If people want to believe that’s their choice. Logic doesn’t matter, especially in times of need, like grief. People grieve those with dementia because they are being taken from us while we watch. It’s a horror that sometimes they “come back” and then are taken again.

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Bad_but_Learning t1_iu6fwcv wrote

>If people want to believe that’s their choice. Logic doesn’t matter, especially in times of need, like grief.

Grieving with logic is more difficult, but overall far more healthy. Knowing you only have one chance with loved ones makes the time you have with them that much more cherished. Thinking that your family is waiting for you in some imaginary place, or will come back through reincarnation doesn't let people accept death for what it is, and sometimes treat the living far worse.. because you can "see them after death". If you can't move past the denial stage of grief you won't ever heal or come to terms with reality.

​

>People grieve those with dementia because they are being taken from us while we watch. It’s a horror that sometimes they “come back” and then are taken again.

It's a harsh reality of life, but that doesn't make it easier, I know -- and there isn't really anything anyone could say to make it "better" or easier for the people going through it.

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tpb772000 OP t1_iu68nel wrote

I tried posting this question 10 times and it kept getting rejected. This wording is the only one that went through lol. Definitely do not like the wording either but at least my point got across.

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Loverboy21 t1_iu64pw5 wrote

You know... you don't regress into a different life. You regress in your own.

Also, considering it's a physiological condition with measurable, physical signs and symptoms, it's far more likely to be a wasting disease of the aged.

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Rednaxella_ t1_iu6c741 wrote

Maybe Alzheimer's would fit more. You forget a lot of things, so once in a while you experience something new even though it's not new.

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-Spin- t1_iu6hv2f wrote

Yea… that’s not what it is. And reincarnation is a fantasy for those afraid of the oblivion.

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Showerthoughts_Mod t1_iu5ksh2 wrote

This is a friendly reminder to read our rules.

Remember, /r/Showerthoughts is for showerthoughts, not "thoughts had in the shower!"

(For an explanation of what a "showerthought" is, please read this page.)

Rule-breaking posts may result in bans.

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nitrohigito t1_iu692kr wrote

That's one remarkably disgusting shower thought if I've ever heard one.

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whenwillitbenow t1_iu6e277 wrote

I think it’s beautiful. And if it helps people grieve and cope then it is a good thought.

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nitrohigito t1_iu6e7xd wrote

Yes, the exact thought of people finding it interesting or appealing at all (let alone beautiful) is the most disturbing part. Utter insanity.

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whenwillitbenow t1_iu6fddk wrote

Have you spent much time with those who have the disease? I work on many units that specialize in it and the grief I see on both sides is the disturbing part to me. If we can take any of that agony away, we should.

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nitrohigito t1_iu6g919 wrote

I have had a close relative with Alzheimers, so yes. So for some people to come and suggest that "this is just their reincarnation taking over bro" is just beyond distasteful. Conning people into thinking it in the name of relief isn't something I can agree with either.

Redefining reality doesn't change it, and it's basically the single most disrespectful thing one can do against those who suffer the effects.

It's an awful process - and I despise when people rob others from living even that through, when they've already been robbed of living anything else.

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whenwillitbenow t1_iu6gse0 wrote

That all sounds like you find the concept of religion disrespectful as it says our currently reality it not everything - and I don’t disagree, as a person never raised in religion. But belief is different from religion, it’s hope. We hope for more

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nitrohigito t1_iu6hnqe wrote

I wasn't particularly addressing religion, though that is indeed (partially) how I feel about it. But rather than (false) hope, I'd prefer either actual options were given (good quality palliative care(*) / euthanasia / quality time spent together), or nothing at all. Hoping in vain is like rubbing salt into a wound.

(*) Of course, this is all very subjective, and in the real world, especially if the patient or the family is religious / follows spiritualist philosophies, this will not be the correct approach. But I hope it was clear this was just me being opinionated throughout.

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whenwillitbenow t1_iu6j1aq wrote

As a palliative nurse (I float to locked behavioural and dementia units) I find belief and religion strongest at this time of life. It helps people grieve. I see it constantly. Logic really doesn’t matter at a time like this, I find the “most logical ones” are often the most lost. Working on this setting has only strengthened my beliefs. (Note this is all my personal experience)

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nitrohigito t1_iu6k2dd wrote

Within the framework of "improving the patient's quality of life to the end" that makes sense. But then I'd say it's pretty justified to feel absolutely in shambles / lost when half the time you're out of it, you know that, and slowly but surely you're nearing death with each passing day.

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whenwillitbenow t1_iu6ltbv wrote

What do you mean by out of it half the time? Many are not confused as death nears. I have coherent conversations with people who pass within hours all the time.this is different from straight dementia

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nitrohigito t1_iu6m0os wrote

I meant it mentally, was thinking about my family member who passed away from Alzheimers. He was visibly not present most of the time, less and less over time.

Could work different for dementia patients, thought the effects were similar.

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whenwillitbenow t1_iu6p466 wrote

Oh sorry for my misunderstanding

When a person is dying of dementia and not some other cause, they are not out of it half the time. The dementia takes memory, then mobility, then fine motor control, then speech, and finally swallowing - usually in that order. When they are in the active dying phase of dementia it’s like they are just a body. But often another cause will take them first, such as infection or choking.

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llluka0103 t1_iu6hfmd wrote

But if people believe in it then what's the problem? If you don't believe in it cool, but that's like getting upset at a Christian for saying their loved one goes to heaven after they die. I'm not religious myself but I'm not gonna shit on other people's beliefs if in reality it's not hurting anyone. And if people who believe in reincarnation actually believe this is how it works then that's like their "religion". If you don't believe in it then just go away?

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nitrohigito t1_iu6i5cj wrote

> But if people believe in it then what's the problem?

Nothing. Go ahead and I'll be mortified on the sidelines hearing about it, maybe make further comments on it in another thread if you ever make it into the news with it.

> If you don't believe in it then just go away?

Am I not allowed to find thoughts posted here disturbing or something? Who are you to tell me to not express that? Why would expressing that be invalid? I'm not obligated to respect people who I find absolutely loony, that's courtesy. Courtesy I don't always find appealing to give.

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llluka0103 t1_iu7317y wrote

You're allowed to express your opinion but there's no need to be a dick about jfc. You ever heard of the word "ignore"? Especially if you can say that it's not causing problems, then you're literally just going out of your way to say your opinion and be mean about it. And if you're allowed to express your opinion on disagreeing then I can do the exact same thing to you, I'm just glad I'm not an ass about it when I do. And quite frankly you sound like a miserable person to be around if all you do is express your opinion in the most distasteful way. I can't imagine ignoring something you don't like takes more energy then to go out of your way to be mean about it just because you want to.

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nitrohigito t1_iu75tgb wrote

> You're allowed to express your opinion but there's no need to be a dick about jfc. You ever heard of the word "ignore"? Especially if you can say that it's not causing problems, then you're literally just going out of your way to say your opinion and be mean about it.

No, I didn't. I didn't bring up religion until you and the other person pressed on, I didn't elaborate on my opinion until I was explicitly asked to, and if you think

> I'm just glad I'm not an ass about it when I do

you're not only being dishonest to me, but to yourself as well.

> I can't imagine ignoring something you don't like takes more energy then to go out of your way to be mean about it

Considering I didn't go out of my way, and the extent I "didn't like this thing" was quite severe, yes, it would have absolutely been more effort. By your logic, you could have "just ignored" what I wrote, I would have been justified telling you to "just go away", and it would have apparently been far easier for you to do so than typing out two massive comments about how miserable you find me.

The absolute hypocrisy you're putting on display is incredible. Go do some soul searching before picking fights with people who you're absolutely in no way superior to, thank you very much.

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CallMePyro t1_iu64gqd wrote

What kind of dementia are you referencing? There are over a dozen different subtypes of dementia, each of them with varying symptoms and degrees of severity.

I think you could learn a lot by reading about dementia and the subtypes (Alzheimers disease, vascular dementia, frontotemporal, etc.) and how they impact the brain.

Also, no posts about religion. Thanks!

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tpb772000 OP t1_iu64s0f wrote

Idk, my friend believes in Hinduism and found out her aunt has dementia, I was trying to be there for her and this popped in my head.

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