Submitted by [deleted] t3_11awtii in LifeProTips
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Submitted by [deleted] t3_11awtii in LifeProTips
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im the guy that brings up old work stuff from 30 years ago and works it into todays issues
congrats, in 30 years you haven‘t worked on your own insecurities.
its more like "ive seen this before, i know how to handle this asshole now."
Actually, i expect people to never even give me a passing thought, and it's always strange when i find out they remember my existence in my absence.
Same. I recognize other people and assume they have zero idea who i am.
Weird, I think about people all the time. I notice their shape, their clothes, their mannerisms, their voice, their walk, their way of speaking, etc. And if I have to interact with them I pay even more attention.
I think most people don’t notice anything beyond themselves, and often don’t even pay attention to their own surroundings, so you’re probably mostly correct.
I’m not going outside anymore
The key thing to focus on is it doesn’t matter what I, or anyone else thinks. I can get very self conscious simply because I know how much I see and judge about others, but I know that their life is unaffected by me noticing things about them, which made me realize I don’t care what they think about me even though I know some people will notice stuff. Some things are immutable, so it’s not like you can do anything about them anyway, and for those that aren’t I just emulate what I like about other people, because it makes me feel good.
You could go to 7-11 in a shag carpet onesie, and people would probably stare, and might even comment, but would it ruin your slurpee and corn nuts?
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Omgosh dude you’re so much more observant than the rest of us
My point is that I don’t believe I am, and this LPT is not correct.
I totally get what you're saying. Observing people and thinking about people go hand in hand. I took this more as like, don't let fear of what others think of you to impact life decisions.
Okay boss man. You’ve said enough
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That never helps me because I judge the shit out of other people.
well hopefully they don't care :)
once you realize they dont, it changes your mindset. other people have stuff going on in their lives they think is more important because it involves them
"You would care less of how much people think of you, if you realised how little they do."
I read an article about this. It was one of those build yourself up type things. Like, worrying about how you look in a swimsuit and being self conscious. People are typically so self absorbed in their own selves that they don't pay attention to anyone else.
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This isn’t true if you’re in a position of leadership, or of envy in general. Whenever anyone, myself included, got promoted at my last workplace, I was appalled at the gossip and malice.
Actually I got to hear recorded gossip of me to listen to. Damn those people I knew gossiped a lot about everything extremely insulted me and analysed every breath I took. To hear this absurdity helped me to not care anymore about talking of others.
You’ll never see those people in public again and they don’t know you or care about you, more than they care about themselves.
Agreed, just try not to care what people think. It generally doesn’t affect you unless you let it. Easier said than done I know, but my life became a whole lot better when I realized that caring what strangers think of me has no real impact on my life unless I hold onto it because of my own insecurities.
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666pool t1_j9vn3gu wrote
I blame high school/middle school for conditioning us. You’re around mostly the same people for years and years. They remember every little thing you did wrong to embarrass and ridicule you. They give you nicknames that stick for years. It’s horrific.
Then you leave and enter the adult world and expect similar behavior from your peers, so you spend the rest of your life defending yourself from this experience.