A guy dressed in regular street clothes walks into a bar on Halloween and orders a beer. "I'm here for the costume party," he tells the bartender. The bartender looks him up and down, taking in his ordinary clothing and no makeup or wig. "What are you supposed to be?" the bartender asks. "I'm a werewolf," the guy replies. "How's that? You're not dressed up at all," the bartender says. "Well, it's not a full moon tonight, now is it Mr. Smart Guy?" the guy replies.

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amnezia13 t1_iuhieds wrote on October 31, 2022 at 11:36 AM

#378,394

What hillblly doesnt know what a taxidermist is?

chrischengwei t1_iuhj8am wrote on October 31, 2022 at 11:45 AM

#378,633

West Virginians know what a taxidermist is. It is dentsts they struggle to identify.

andrianc3g4g t1_iuhjj1s wrote on October 31, 2022 at 11:48 AM

#378,702

All the hillbillies sitting around the bar look up from their beer and whiskey, expecting to ese some pitiful Yanke from the north.

The bartender says, ‟You ain’t from around here, are ya?”

The guy says, ‟No, I am from Canada.”

‟Canada,” the bartender says, ‟what do you do in Canada?”

The guy says, ‟I am a taxidermist.”

The bartender says, ‟A taxidermist? What in the hell is a taxidermist? Do you drive a taxi?”

‟No,” says the Canadian ‟I don’t drive a taxi, I mount animals.”

The bartender grins and hollers, ‟It’s okay boys. He is one of us.”

h5n1zzp t1_iuhlbov wrote on October 31, 2022 at 12:06 PM

#379,212

I used to be a werewolf but I'm alright noooooow

Waitsfornoone t1_iuhr7va wrote on October 31, 2022 at 1:01 PM

#380,981

I'm guessing this was not in London.

Blutarg t1_iui8c85 wrote on October 31, 2022 at 3:09 PM

#386,153

Never moon a werewolf.

Blutarg t1_iui8h6e wrote on October 31, 2022 at 3:10 PM

#386,187

Replying to Waitsfornoone (#380,981)

No one said "pip pip cheerio!" so you're right.

amerkanische_Frosch t1_iuibpfb wrote on October 31, 2022 at 3:32 PM

#387,130

Lady sends out invitations to a costume party. "Come dressed as an emotion!"

First guest shows up wearing a green spandex outfit with the letters "N" and "V" everywhere. "I'm green with envy!" Hostess laughs and invites him in.

Second guest shows up in a pink outfit with feathers around her private parts. "I'm tickled pink!" Hostess laughs and invites her in.

Two fellows show up, entirely in the nude. One has his dick encased in a tub of yellowish cream, the other has his dick encased in a pear sliced in two and wrapped around his member.

Hostess is outraged: "Just what the hell kind of emotions are THOSE supposed to be?"

First fellow responds: "Well, I'm fucking disgusted. And my friend here has come in despair."