Houki01
Houki01 t1_j6huo3x wrote
Reply to 3.8 billion people believe human life started with a Man and His Clone by Acceptable-Shape-528
Not quite, Adam and Eve's son Cain took a wife from the Land of Nod and made a life there, so there had to be humans out there in the Land of Nod, wherever that was.
Houki01 t1_j6cwkr0 wrote
Reply to comment by CK1ing in [WP] The power of love and friendship wasn’t enough. Not quite. So we gave the magical girls guns. by CrumbledTGMS
Yep. Magical Girl Lyrical Nanoha. What happens when you give a nine year old a magical wand that turns into a BFG that shoots lasers? Watch and find out!
Edit: the wand is sentient, loves dakka, and can power up on its own if it thinks Nanoha's in danger.
Houki01 t1_j3pdxr6 wrote
Reply to comment by ApiContraption in PsBattle: This freshly cut pepper. by RealHarambae
It isn't happy.
Houki01 t1_j2bmzhr wrote
Reply to [WP] Every species in the galaxy eventually fell to a robot uprising, leading to the eradication of their people. Therefore the machine-council of the galaxy are surprised when a newly discovered machine civilisation from a planet they designated "Earth" arrives side by side with their creators. by Kitty_Fuchs
"We're here."
Kressa's voice echoed through the ship. I blinked as I lifted my head from the desk. Damn, I fell asleep while working again. "Cool, honey. How is first contact going?"
"Um. Kind of weird, actually, Mum. They're... they're like me. And all the other electrokids. No born humans-"
"You were born! And you're not weird, you're my own little girl, and don't you ever forget it."
An electrokid was much more of a miracle than a meatkid, these days. Compatible sperm and ovum meet in the Petri dish, zygote placed in the artificial uterus at the appropriate point, meatkid removed at the right time, bingo, we have a new human. Electrokids, on the other hand... hours of coding, melding of compatible programs, thousands of prayers to gods that don't exist that this time the magical alchemy will happen... Kressa had been produced with as much blood, sweat and tears as an old-fashioned body birth, and she was my dear daughter. Say my baby isn't my baby because she's an electrokid, and I will eviscerate you with my pencil.
"Anyway, Mum, will you come down and talk with them? The diplomats are stuck on the whole 'one species two forms' thing. Maybe a parent of an electrokid can communicate with them."
Houki01 t1_iy5ybtr wrote
Reply to [WP] You're a 'comically incompetent' supervillain for a group of C-List heroes. They are no real threat to you, so you endure their childish speeches. However, when the heroes raid the civilian business you run on the side and injure your employees, you decide to take yourself seriously for once. by Informal_Ad_6157
That's it. That is, finally, it, I decided, as I stomped my way out of the hospital. Felicity was going to be in traction for six weeks. David's gunshot wound would heal cleanly but ICU trauma was a thing. And Ricky, dammit, what they'd done to Ricky was downright criminal.
It's all right to play with me, but when you get civilians involved, that's it. Time to take the gloves off. You wanna play, kids? Then let's play.
It took a week to set up. But justice isn't fast.
Sabotaging Silver Saint's Tesla was child's play. Finding a way to program in a route that wouldn't take out innocent bystanders took a couple of hours, but she was done and dusted in less than a morning. It was remarkably easy to look at the bill for Alana's new artificial leg (the insurance company insisted on sending me the itemised bill for all their procedures. Shut up and take the goddamn premiums, you soulless vultures) and any guilt just went away.
They sentenced my people to a lifetime of scars and suffering for answering a help wanted ad. They would get all the mercy from me that they deserved.
Such a shame about Fireball's cute little suburban bungalow. It's kind of scary how easy it is to sabotage a gas heating system. This is why you always hire a reputable technician to service your boiler, kids!
Blue Tornado was a tad trickier. I wanted it to be in his civilian identity, because he'd gone after my civilian identity, but I wanted it to relate to his powers. Finally, I settled on an air pressure hose breaking just as he was using it on his car, blowing up in his face and causing concussive damage. No civilians involved.
It all went off without a hitch. Boom, boom, boom.
########
The High Circle of Superheroes looked at the evidence. A crashed car, a burned house and a exploded tyre inflation station, all three putting one person in hospital, and no-one else. One person. A superhero. And to each, a bouquet had been sent, consisting of geraniums, foxglove, yellow carnations and orange lilies. The card had included a photo of an injured person, and the words "Galatians 6:7".
"Okay, we need to revise Boobytrap's threat level." Superior, the leader of the group, said.
#######
Geraniums mean "stupidity", foxglove means "insincerity", yellow carnations mean "you have disappointed me" and orange lilies mean "hatred"; this particular arrangement is colloquially known among florists as "the fuck you bouquet".
Galatians 6:7 : "Do not be decieved; God is not mocked, for what a man sows, that he shall reap."
Houki01 t1_ixbz9kq wrote
Reply to comment by Nuada-Argetlam in [WP] When you learned your mother was a goddess, things finally seemed to fall into place. The other demigods laughed at you, the only child born to the goddess of the hearth, Hestia. But your power was so much more than they could dream of. by not_quite_graceful
Also Hercules proposed and she said no.
Houki01 t1_irr3yb2 wrote
Reply to AskScience AMA Series: I am Prof. Beverley Hunt, OBE, and I am a hematologist in London, England. I am also chair of the World Thrombosis Day Steering Committee. I am here to talk about why MTHFR testing is unnecessary and can cause misinterpretation. AMA! by AskScienceModerator
What is thrombophilia? I get that thrombosis is a medical condition involving the arteries around the heart, but doesn't the -philia suffix denote an affection for something?
Houki01 t1_irps6u6 wrote
Reply to Enjoy the details. I work 16 hours edit and merge 380 RAW images of the moon and the final result was worth it by daryavaseum
Probably not your preferred response: "wait, the moon is pink and purple?"
Houki01 t1_j9fr39u wrote
Reply to comment by Cindexxx in [EU] After many years of research The Riddler has finally discovered undeniable proof of Batman's secret identity. Together with the Joker, Bane, and many other villains he prepares an attack on The Daily Planet to take out Clark Kent while he least expects it. by Visual_Philosopher74
No, that is the joke, that the Riddler has riddled the completely wrong answer.