>can get through it without having to think or visualize a lot.

You do not actually have to visualize fiction. I think it is a bit weird you can read non fiction without thinking, if anything I would think non fiction requires even more thinking than fiction. some non fiction actually requires visualizing to understand properly.

Can you give some examples of that non fiction which worked for you and the fiction which did not?

>instead I do other things during my free time, like watching youtube. I also think reading books would be better for my brain than watching youtube endlessly lol

I do not think books are the universal better hobby, but watching youtube videos for hours is probably not going to lead to any insights into anything or relaxation.

So I guess the answer, just do not watch youtube videos for hours on end. If you want to use that time to read books, fine, if not, if you wanna do some volunteering or exercise or draw or clean stuff, that is also a good thing. Take a breather from spending hours watching youtube videos, that will be a win, whether you want to read books or not.

> So I guess not reading books might come from having a closed mind which could be solved by reading.

Reading does not necessarily solve a closed mind or actually "improve" a person. I am not a believer, or fan, of the mindset that reading is "good" for you, or always improving somewhat or better than all other hobbies at something.

And mandatory perspective I read lots and always have, own way too many books, but trust me a lot of books I read did not "improve me" necessarily and that is not why I read or I look for new things to think, or relaxation it can be on many things. Somebody iliterate can be observant and tolerant and intelligent.

>since the person is prone to saying that they learned from life experience while all I have is a college education

I stopped right here. That person is not necessarily looking to find out, or to change their minds or to get a new perspective on why people do hobbies they do not, that person is looking to put you down, perhaps due to their own insecurity about their own education when compared to yours. Keep that in mind. You do not owe them any justification or rationalization.

> but for the love of God, why would anyone feel good about not reading books?

anti-intellectualism and also trying to turn lack of ability (maybe to focus) into a voluntary choice which validates it. Happens a lot also with exercise or food choices. People taking care of their bodies in ways which makes them happy can get a lot of criticism from others who choose not to do, that or believe exercise and healthy diet is a good thing.

> A book is basically a whole gym full of equipment ready to be used.

Well, not all books are the same and even great books, people can get there and not use that equipment.

You picked up a book which sounded interesting, started to read it, did not like it because there was a sex scene. OK.

I am a bit confused here, you want validation to feeling disappointed a book turned out to not be something you liked?

>Am i judging it to hard

There is no too hard or too soft, or objective judgment. You did not like what you were reading, that is fine.

I liked it, and it is very much of a time and place, the 20s and eastern coast of the USA but I am not sure I would call it the pinpoint of american values and ideals. It is kind of vague social mobility right? Is it more a pinpoint of american values than say To Kill a Mockingbird or Catch 22or even Huckleberry Finn (I liked these much better...). Or Grapes of Wrath? (it is very earnest, very committed, and not enjoyable but it is certainly strong and fluent and a really great portrayal of America as a society in turmoil...)

No. I have vaguely kind of yearly TBRs, books I mean to read (or try) that year, but if I do not, it's fine. I got a release calendar and some books are insta-reads (but if it is not that is also fine).

I got a truly very large TBR and of books I mean to try, and that was a bit angst provoking (the DUTY of reading TBR books! It felt like slacking off if I did not) but honestly I got over it. I just can not read, or enjoy reading, books on schedule, so I try to be analytical about my exact mood (no depressing books if I am stressed...), alternating genres, if I "indulge" in just published new books (which somehow seem always more attractive) then I should give also a try to old TBRs (which somehow often are great).

I just try to pay attention to my mood, and changing genres, and themes, and lengths and all. I quit books at will and sometimes I sample paragraphs from 5, 10 books before I decide to start one. I am fine with this, it is what works for me.

>I am a very avid reader

I never understand what is a "avid" reader as redditors use the word. But nevermind it.

If you want to write a fan letter or communication, just do, if authors do not want it, they can not check their mails or whatever (and some do not).

But keep something in mind, sometimes it might be disappointing to know too much about the authors, and it might affect how you enjoy a book. A quote from a favorite book of mine

“Despite the fact that he loves books and owns a bookstore, A.J. does not particularly care for writers. He finds them to be unkempt, narcissistic, silly, and generally unpleasant people. He tries to avoid the ones who've written books he loves for fear that they will ruin their books for him.”

>However, being addicted to books is generally considered a positive attribute,

Tell that to poor D.Quixote.

Well, how far is too far for one extreme, is certainly subjective, and you should have put disclaimers yourself your metric is of course just subjective, and as such it is only, like, your opinion.

And anyway, the opinion quoted was not in reply to me, it was to somebody stating somebody which IMO (yay for people who say that) that it was one of the worst books THEY themselves had ever read. Which seemed more than fair. If it was unfairly combative and alienated people of differing tastes (who by the way could not or did not bother to spell) that seemed fair enough and that is the people I want to hang around digitally with.

And because I was replying to replied to /u/pornplz22526 and blocked me automatically, here goes my reply to them!

>>"This is an opinion" is always the default.

I think it is unnecessary when a statement is "one of the worst books I ever read" (or such phrasing), since it is clearly a relative statement and to do with what the person saying it had read.

Also if always the default (and it is) surely one does not need to type it all the time? Or maybe we can get a short cut, maybe reddit can nicely fill some autotext for us so we can add "this is an opinion" is added automatically for all posts, for those who need to be reminded of it.

>The rest of your comment is a confused mess.

Oh, sorry! I see you blocked me so I am sure you will be spared ever more needing to think about anything I might have to say and will not ever encounter any opinion slightly diverging from yours. Very on topic actually, now I think of it.

Even here there is some baffling commenters who seem to think readers should not criticize ("bash") books, or with comments like "It's not my fav too but how bout u just say it wasn't ur type nd move on w/o dissing on it?" (notice spelling... this in response to somebody saying a book was one of the worst they ever read) or lots more of the implied thing "if you can not say something nice, do not say anything". I think tiktok might encourage that kind of toxic positivity way more.

There really is a mindset that it is almost like unfair of readers to dare think a book is objectively bad, or worse than the average they read or one of the worst books they read. In case it hurts the feelings of those who loved it, or even worse, the author

You are right about the competitiveness reading seems to be acquiring for many people (somebody here today is asking if reread books should "COUNT", count for what).

But I do not recognize a lot of things. I use goodreads a lot, just do not join nor ever click like on any "challenge" (just do not compare yourself to others), and I find it incredibly useful to research books I want to read, or get recommendations from friends. My time is finite, I do not mind taking risks, but if my reading was totally random I might lose out on things for sure I would like.

>issue is with developing the discipline. between a book and unwarranted doomscrolling

The issue is probably the unwarrated doomscrolling in general. If you do not read but go run, or clean or whatever productive thing that is all good.

If it is between you and doomscrolling, the doomscrolling seems to be a huge social issue and is affecting a lot of people. If you got an iphone set up limits? on android there must be apps for that. And just try to put it down particularly in the evening (screens and social media are IMO not good for sleep quality).

Are you reading books how? I think paper or e-ink ebook readers are very distraction free, but reading on devices with led screens much more dispersive and unfocused plus harder on the eyes.

I put absolutely no pressure on myself and do not give a fuck about building my reading habit.

Just pick books you want to read, or look forward for some quiet so you can find what happens next.

Yeah, totally, for ages. And books owned, bought, discarded also. Started with an excel file, still on going.

Started just with books ordered, or books I wanted to order, and more and more it is useful to me to keep track of what I own and have read. I am bad at titles and author names, and it is helps me remember books I only remember vague things about.

I also keep track on goodreads and calibre (many many extra columns, and empty book records also).

I do not keep track of how much or stats or that sort of stuff, just list of what I read and when.

> Thank you for opening my eyes to Bookfinder. I see Amazon (De) has a pretty good collection and that should mean no import taxes as well.

they might have import taxes, it does not matter where the amazon is, just where the seller is.

>Do you know of any specific firms like this?

for used books, not specifically, but for books in general bookdepository (and if book is not out of print, it will likely be bew less than 5+20 dollars for shipping)

or dotde or dotes or dotfr or dotit

>20 dollars

where in europe is that? where in europe (that makes a big difference? You are not european yourself to think you do not need to specify country of it EU?)

books in which language, english?

Use bookfinder and put shipping country.

I do not know for how long you have lived where you live in now, but importing, shipping books has been expensive for a long time. Brexit did not help with the acess for english language books. Another alternative is to look at all the european based amazons, including UK (though if you are in the eu or another country with strict customs you might pay custom taxes) and check there for used copies and their shipping prices to your country. Though keep in mind even using amazon ostensibly for EU countries, if the place the seller ships is outside the EU it is liable for customs, though some sellers seem to take care of it.

If you are starting to read books in a foreign language, the books you start with matter. It is like wanting to run a race or marathon, you do not start right out with a big complex thing. Start smaller, less ambitiously, as a way to practice. Because if you start with something really hard and messy, you might complete it but be such a chore it will put you off reading more in the future.

Start with something shorter more manageable, less specific vocabulary. Novellas, or YA fiction, short stories.

Another tip, if you got an ebook reader, ebooks are fantastic because inbuilt dictionary or dictionaries to helo you.

I did not say you had. I just did not understood the "I'm just really straight." in relation to be drawn to male characters. I still do not, but whatever.

I just did not understand the comment of you "I'm just really straight." and how that related to "favorite characters from each piece of fiction I read being male".

But sure, you can like whatever you like and do not need my permission or anybody's really. But it is interesting to analyze this.

> I'm just really straight.

English is not my native language, not sure I understood. You relate more to main male characters because you are attracted to males and not to women? Even in horror books, not even romance novels? You only enjoy reading about main POVS characters you would be attracted to?

She does not have to justify it, or even mention it. But she wants validation or perspective and in that case yeah, it is interesting to talk about.

I am all "read whatever you like" and that is fine. But there are things more important than books, and this preference is worth examining, not necessarily because OP reads more widely (it is perfectly fine to read just type X of books) but because it might be worth examining if it reflects a bias she has also in real life or not, or even applied to herself (which is the worst kind of bias, when used to punish oneself)

>I've never found that identifying or not identifying with a character because of their gender was why I did or did not enjoy a book.

Good for you, good pics. But a few times, yeah, I have been totally pulled off enjoying a book by characters behaving in ways that made no sense to me considering their gender and social circunstances which out some stresses, constraints which did not fit actions...

>I just tend to relate to fictional men more than I relate to fictional women.

Well, there is always Murderbot, and Ancillary Justice. And a few others like Iain Banks 's minds (and a few surprise ones).

>This doesn’t mean I think I am “not like other girls”. I just tend to relate to fictional men more than I relate to fictional women.

That is worth examining, like I said before. Why? And you do not have to tell us the whys, or even know it right now, I am just trying to validate you are very right to question it and think about the whys. And questions, not for you to answer, but just to think about:

Does it make a difference in which way? They are more mysterious? Do they do more interesting things? Do you give them a free pass if they act in selfish ways? And maybe more importantly, are you giving also men in real life more of an excuse, find them more interesting, are "boys going to be boys" or "how great that father is at babysitting his children" and stuff like that? Just think about it.