Submitted by diamondhound2509 t3_125itdp in tifu
At work, there's this lady in the office, let's call her Mary. Mary and I have always been friendly towards each other, plenty of banter, and we're similar in that she doesn't get offended by anything, neither do I. We've made some really goofy and silly jokes before.
Anyway, yesterday I needed to go into the office to drop off some paper work. Mary gets up, and she's wearing a very low cut top. So I tell her she needs to put those "weapons of mass distraction" away or people will be walking funny. She laughs and says I can have a better look later, which kinda made me smile and blush. I should note, Mary is happily married to another woman. This is just office banter.
Unbeknownst to either of us, another girl was walking into the office, heard our conversation and reported it as sexual assault in the workplace.
I got called into the office earlier today to give a statement about it. Told them that it was a joke between Mary and myself and no harm was intended from either party.
Now let's see what happens
Edit: so, here's the update. Mary, myself and BITCH FACE (because someone said something about me calling her a bitch, so now I'm doubling down) got called together into the office with the manager.
Manager has asked Mary and I to refrain from such jokes in the future in the workplace. It wasn't in inappropriate between us so no further action. Next time, sexual harrasment course.
Little miss BITCH was instructed to a) mind her own business. The comment wasn't aimed at her. If anything, she should've asked Mary to report me and she'd have been a witness. B) that there is a HUGE difference between harrasment and assault, and her using the latter could've not only gotten me fired, but police involved, and c) during the investigation, manager has spoken to people she's friendly with and they've claimed she has made similar comments before to other people without further action.
Manager asked if we wanted to take it further, we both said no, let it slide, just TALK to people before you run to the boss.
TL;DR. Made a joke with a colleague at work, now being accused of sexual assault at work