Is reskilling / starting a new career worth it in my situation? 30 years old.

Submitted by GuidanceParticular42 t3_126x6x2 in personalfinance

Long post. Appreciate any help. 30 years old and my wife divorced me quite out of the blue six months ago. This isn't r/relationship_advice so I'll save that sob story.

I have almost no work experience. I graduated with a mechanical engineering degree in 2015, and worked for only a year after graduation. It was a fly-in, fly-out job that I loathed and my girlfriend (future ex-wife) encouraged me to quit as she saw how much it was killing me. She was also fresh out of college but already earning good money, more than enough to support both of us (we live pretty frugally in a MCOL city). I started applying to new jobs, with no success. My wife had great success early in her career, but it required a ton of hours. We both realized though how nice life can be with one person staying home (I did all the household tasks, cooked, planned events/trips, etc.). I stopped trying to search for work, and the setup worked well for us, or at least I thought it did. Since 2016, I maybe have two years of part-time work experience doing various odd-jobs (mostly serving but also some math tutoring), more as entertainment than for the money.

Post divorce: I'm looking into career paths where I can support myself and work towards early retirement. I don't feel with my current resume I'm employable as an engineer, and even if I were, I don't think I'd enjoy the work.

Two paths I've considered:

-Software development, or something similar (ie web development). My only experience in this is one course in college (my only A+) but I certainly feel it's something I could enjoy and would be good at. I have a logical mind and enjoy problem solving, and would ideally self study for a year and/or maybe do a bootcamp while seeking employment. The issue here is that the field is having layoffs left and right, and I genuinely don't know if I'd be able to break into the industry. It seems even computer science majors with internships are struggling to land entry level roles offering 60k/year, so I don't know what hope I'd have. While it's a lengthy discussion, there's also the risk of AI leading to a lot of job losses in this area in the future.

-Anesthesiologist Assistant (AA): very different but seems to be one of the highest ROI masters, costing around $100,000 but leading to a high likelihood of a $125-175k role after graduation. Some sources say job security is amazing and growing, others say the career may not even exist in a decade (major pushback from nurses unions), so there's some risk associated. The other issue is that it wouldn't be until fall 2024 I could gain admission, and then 2.5 years of study, meaning it is nearly a 4-year path for a career I'm not even certain I'd enjoy.

Both seem to have big drawbacks. Which leads me to my third option... serving/bartending. I've worked a bit as a server (making around $35/hour on average) and feel confident I could get another job serving, and work towards being a bartender within a year which I feel like could comfortably earn around 80k/year doing (my experience is many even clear 100k, but let's be conservative). Part of me feels that going this route is "giving up" and that a lot of people in my life might look down on me (and I'd be lying if I said I didn't care about what other people think), especially having an engineering degree from a top 20 school and being known my whole life as "the smart friend", but the other part of me kind of feels as though I have to prioritize my own stress levels and financial goals over what anyone else thinks.

My retirement goal is quite low at around 1.2m in today's value. At 3.5% I could draw down 40k/year at this level, which is an amount I happily live on in the USA. I'd also be happy to live in central America (I speak spanish) or potentially SE Asia, which would stretch this money even further.

From investments I made early in life, plus divorce money, I have about 350k currently, no debts. Working for 80k/year, I'm confident I could save about 2k/month or 24k/year.

350k principal, adding 24k/year, at an average return of 4% real (let's say 7% but discount 3% for inflation) gets me to my 1.2 million goal (inflation adjusted) in only 16 years. So in theory, I can retire in around 16 working as a bartender. Not bad at all, especially for a job I know I can tolerate (and even somewhat enjoy).

Assessing my AA situation, discount 200k from my current NW (tuition + living expenses since I wouldn't be able to work much), I'd be starting at around 150k principal, four years behind. On a 140k salary (conservative average), I'd be able to save around 60k/year.

Interestingly, this brings me to 17 years to retire (4 years to graduate, 13 years working) assuming the same conditions as a bartender. It kind of makes it hard to justify the higher risk of spending 100k on education, studying for the MCAT, additional stress, and less flexibility in where I live (AAs can only serve in certain states and you seem to take the role you can get, even if it means moving) for a career path that leads to a similar retirement plan.

Thanks for reading my long post. Any advice or thoughts? Am I missing anything attacking the career problem from this angle? Any other career options I should explore?

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mgd09292007 t1_jebffo9 wrote

I’ve heard many times that most people restart their career paths 2-3 times in their life. Do what makes your life the best quality you can. Time is the one thing you can’t change. Do you want to do something you hate for more money or something you love for all that time?

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SlowDownToGoDown t1_jebj5r8 wrote

Is there a reason you can't pursue an engineering job with your ME degree?

You seem to enjoy being a server, which generally requires decent people skills. Is a sales engineering role a better fit your skillset/personality?

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GuidanceParticular42 OP t1_jebnrj8 wrote

>Is there a reason you can't pursue an engineering job with your ME degree?

To be honest, I remember virtually nothing from the degree. I don't have anywhere near enough experience to get anything but completely entry-level, and I struggle to believe I'd be hired over the numerous new-grads who have the material fresh in their mind and a "cleaner" resume. If I'm going to have to overcome the huge obstacle of having multi-year gaps on my resume, I'd rather it be in a field that I think I have a higher chance of enjoying, as my first experience with mech eng was just entirely negative.

>You seem to enjoy being a server, which generally requires decent people skills. Is a sales engineering role a better fit your skillset/personality?

This is a good suggestion. I'll look into it more. I've always had a bit of a bias against sales positions but it could be a good fit.

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RobfromHB t1_jebpy9u wrote

You may find this to be even more true about the career paths you listed. Becoming a SWE is tough without the four-year degree to break through the recruiter wall. Many bootcamps, despite the marketing, are money grabs with poor placement results. Be wary.

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GuidanceParticular42 OP t1_jebqts7 wrote

Yes that's a big fear of mine, specifically if I try a self-study route. I have some friends who have had some success with doing post-diploma certificates in fields like data science, but their starting salaries are also less than what I've made serving, which isn't too enticing.

It's part of why I'm either leaning towards a specialized master's program (to "start fresh" after graduation). I could also get a second bachelors in computer science in probably 2 years. It's a big time commitment without a guaranteed payoff though.

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RobfromHB t1_jebsvl1 wrote

More power to those friends. I've tried that road personally and it's brutally hard. If you have the financial runway and can get credits for GE classes, a bachelors in CS could be done quickly like you said. No payoff is guaranteed, but the stats are skewed heavily in favor of it being a good idea. By the time you get through it the hiring downturn should be in the rearview mirror. Pursuing the degree is a very structured way to make sure you're on the right learning track and probably a worthwhile distraction from the personal stuff. If you go that route, get internships, have side projects, and grind leetcode a little bit each day. You can do it.

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Celodurismo t1_jebuffe wrote

Checkout OMSCS if you haven’t already. It’s an affordable online MS from GT. No other program has the variety of classes at such a low price, not to mention a great reputation. With a stem BS you shouldn’t have too much trouble getting in. May have to take a prerequisite (DS&A) to improve your chances.

I’d avoid the post bacc path just because of their crazy prices. Definitely avoid bootcamps.

You’re in a rough position because you really need income. I’m tempted to say go bartend part time and do OMSCS “fulltime”. In two years, possibly less, you could be on your way.

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stringer4 t1_jec2534 wrote

I had a different career and changed paths at 30. I taught myself some basic web development/JS and when I liked it I went to a coding boot camp. Landed a job and have been employed since. It’s definitely possible

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happyagainin2019 t1_jebxwdp wrote

You mentioned an Anesthesia Assistant - another option that you might wish to consider with a great ROI - obtain a 2 year RN degree - get a job - usually the hospital will pay for your BSN - all online - then you could consider CRNA - a Register Nurse Anesthetist - RN’s can make upwards of $80-$100,000/annually - as a CRNA - $175,000 to $250,000. Just some food for thought.

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tossme68 t1_jecs539 wrote

It would also take the OP a year, maybe two to get into a nursing program and then the program is 2 years and a CRNA is an even longer program (again if you can get into the program). In addition most of the better hospitals want an RNBS, so add more time. If the OP is looking for a quick turn around nursing is not the way to go.

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happyagainin2019 t1_jed2l1t wrote

Great point - glad you brought it up! I was thinking more in terms of “reward” vs “time”.

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Rainbowscarab69 t1_jee15r3 wrote

No. OP has a bachelors and can apply to a one year accelerated BSN program. This is probably the best option actually.

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tonyisadork t1_jeea9m2 wrote

So? OP is only 30. That's a solid 35 more working years ahead of them. Spend 4 years prepping and it's still a great ROI if they enjoy the work.

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PTVA t1_jec9rg8 wrote

Look into sales engineer role. You don't need many hard skills, but having the me degree will likely enable you to talk the talk and understsnd analytically what you are selling, why, etc. It's a massive industry and pay is all over the place. From 60k to millions if you work your way up to enterprise sales for an in demand product.

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LeisureSuitLaurie t1_jectytb wrote

Good call!

Sales engineering is a great fit for people who have analytical and people skills but who don’t necessarily want to skew too hard in either direction (I.e., hunting leads or building product).

At my $2b tech company these folks are very well regarded, well paid and very busy.

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alwayslookingout t1_jebjbns wrote

The CAA degree seems like such a huge departure from your prior education and degree. Do you even have any interest in healthcare at all or worked in the industry before?

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GuidanceParticular42 OP t1_jebphws wrote

>The CAA degree seems like such a huge departure from your prior education and degree.

Part of why CAA interested me is it's not actually a big departure from my previous education. I spent my first two years on the ChemE path, which means I have all the chemistry reqs required. I did two semester of biology as an elective too, and of course have all the math (calc, stats) and physics reqs finished. I was surprised when looking at the prereqs that for most CAA programs I'm only missing an anatomy & physiology course, which would be fairly easy to get and I'd actually look forward to the chance to boost my GPA a bit.

I have no experience working in the healthcare industry but do have an interest in it. I won't dive into my justifications but I think it's a field I could enjoy.

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tossme68 t1_jecsrnd wrote

Bartending is a young man's job, the opportunity to be a 50 year old, male bartender are few and far between. Further, the job is not good for the soul, it may be fine for a young, single guy but the hours, the booze and generally toxic environment of working in a bar/restaurant is not good for an adult. Let's also not forget that most service jobs don't include health insurance and other benefits that while may not seem like much at 30 they are super important later in life.

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Aisher t1_jebl1jb wrote

If you can serve or bartend for enough to pay the bills you could do that at night and weekends while you work 8-5 at your new career (entry level if necessary). Since you aren’t married and don’t have kids (I think) you could spend a year getting your life setup and do it all with cash flow - no going into debt

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monty845 t1_jebps3m wrote

I did the new Career in CS thing. Applied 2 weeks before classes started to the nearest state school, got accepted for a 2nd BS Degree in CS. Got my CS degree in 5 semesters, taking almost every course the department offered. I took more than I needed to, but specifically wanted to have a good internship once I knew what I was doing, between semesters 4-5.

Got an internship with a non-tech company. They seemed to like me, and I got a job offer to start in January after my last semester. Got promoted 4 times in 5 years. Its not big tech pay, but its very good pay for my very low cost of living area I live in.

Things are a bit rough in the software job markets right now, but in a year or two it could be very different. Also, remember that people complaining on reddit about struggling to find jobs are often doing something wrong. I was reading those same posts when I got my job offer.

(To be clear, I applied for 1 internship and got it. They were taking longer than I liked to get me a formal offer the next fall, so I applied to one other company, but got my offer just after the other company invited me for an onsite interview, and took the firm offer)

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dlm2137 t1_jec7kxf wrote

You should go the software engineering bootcamp route, but I would add one condition — take a month or two and start teaching yourself, to the point where you can create a simple web app, and see if you enjoy it.

I did a bootcamp, and many of the challenges that you hear about on reddit about breaking into the industry are true. But if you are smart and most importantly, passionate about the work, you can 100% do it.

I often describe my job as getting paid to play with legos all day. So definitely try it out, but if it feels like legos — that is, fun and creative rather than a slog — I think you’ll definitely be capable of making a successful transition there.

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xhouliganx t1_jec80y4 wrote

One industry to consider is Consumer Products. That’s the industry I currently work in as an analyst. It’s generally not a difficult industry to get into as long as you can demonstrate transferable skills. The starting salary for an analyst can range from 60-80k depending on the company. However, if you’re good at it, and show initiative to move up in your organization you could be making six figures within a 4-5 years. The work isn’t particularly stressful, most CPG companies offer good benefits, and it’s virtually recession proof. Check out companies like General Mills, Dr Pepper, Colgate, or Reckitt. I worked for someone with a fashion degree in my previous company, so with your degree you shouldn’t have too much of a problem.

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Kazimira-darkside t1_jeceg89 wrote

Hi! This sounds interesting as hell. Would you be willing to expand a bit, like what kind of education you had and how you got into the industry?

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JungleCrab t1_jed74yn wrote

I am very interested in this field. Could you recommend the best way of getting into these careers and what skills are most important?

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xhouliganx t1_jegw80a wrote

As I mentioned in my other comment, I would suggest studying business or marketing or any other similar area of study. Having the ability to recognize trends and tell a story with your findings is the most important skill to have. Being curious and asking the “why.” It’s also really important to be proficient in excel as you will be using it daily to manipulate and maintain data. Data visualization tools like Power BI and Tableau are also widely used. Taking courses and getting certifications on those tools will really set you apart. Do some research on common data reporting tools like IRI (now called Circana), Nielsen, Numerator, and Atlas. I believe it’s possible to get certifications in those as well. Feel free to message me if you have any other questions.

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Ahluongo t1_jebk3yu wrote

Have you looked into the trades or becoming an apprentice? You’d get paid to learn and have a lot of optionality once you’re out of your apprenticeship.

Also, another thought would be to explore using the degree you have and jump into a job that will train you.

Last thing, explore! Check out various careers/jobs, talk to people, try and fail at some jobs and see what happens. You have a lot of options here and I wouldn’t necessarily take on debt for a job yet. You’re planning for retirement, which is great! Don’t saddle yourself with unnecessary debt.

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ItsWetInWestOregon t1_jebr7ua wrote

For the Anesthesiologist Assistant Masters, do you have the right pre-requisites from your Bachelors? Are you going to take the MCAT? Or GRE?

This is a career path I talk to my kids about. It does seem to be a very good path to a good income.

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GuidanceParticular42 OP t1_jebsysb wrote

For most programs I look at, I'm only missing one or two of the prereqs. I'd likely enroll for a semester and finish these prereqs, and also maybe redo a few courses where I had poor grades at the same time to bolster my application.

I would likely aim for schools that take the GRE as I've score 97th+ percentile on similar tests (SAT, GMAT) and am confident I could do similar on the GRE. I'd maybe also do the MCAT as I think some of the schools require it (I'd plan to apply to a lot of schools to help my chances of getting into at least 1).

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LadyStrife t1_jebu1mn wrote

Are your prerequisites current enough? I say this because most medical/biology/chemistry classes for an advanced degree were only valid for up to 5 years. You may need to retake all of the classes because you graduated 8 years ago.

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ItsWetInWestOregon t1_jebunxz wrote

This is what happened to me, my math and science courses needed to be within 7 years. It did not matter that I’d received a degree. I wasn’t going for a master though, just a different bachelors and an additional professional certification.

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GuidanceParticular42 OP t1_jec104a wrote

That's a good heads-up, I didn't consider this so thank you. Some initial research shows that some schools have 5 or 7 year prereq expiration dates, with no exceptions. Other schools have prereq expiration dates, but will waive them with a 500 MCAT. Others have no expiration, so I'd be good there.

Definitely limits my options though. Without an MCAT or redoing courses it looks like I'd go from 12 options down to 2... pretty tough.

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LadyStrife t1_jeeew7d wrote

Its not even that they are current enough. Could you jump into a class that assumes you know everything? The professors may glance over the basics but they won't spend time teaching all the pre-reqs again

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Sheppard47 t1_jebrxv0 wrote

Is there a reason you don’t want to be an engineer?

My coworkers are mostly ME or biomedical engineers and those roles start like 70k and go up from there?

Software is cool but you already have a really marketable degree.

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GuidanceParticular42 OP t1_jebtqve wrote

Commented elsewhere in the thread but I'm just not convinced I could land a good MechE job. I'd be competing with a massive resume gap against fresh grads. I tried the job search after leaving my first job and wasn't successful even with hundreds of apps sent, resume review, etc. I can't imagine it would be better with an added six years of distance between me and my studies and engineering experience.

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Sheppard47 t1_jebvb4w wrote

I mean you’d be gunning for a entry level role (junior, associate, etc). However I think you would have a realistic chance. You will have to explain it in interviews but I don’t think it’s unrealistic. The market sucks right now in some industries but there’s some roles out here, a lot if your willing to relocate.

Any set specific field or area you had kore experience in (aerospace, automobiles, med device, etc)

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Sansoldier t1_jebyzno wrote

Do you have any notes from school? Either way, the interview process could be a good strategy for pinpointing any gaps in knowledge to gauge how much work you need to do vs. going for bartending. Once you are hired, I think it would be more practical to learn from your co-workers (even ones outside of your discipline) and utilize any educational assistance programs over spending so much on a degree by yourself. 30 years old is still considered somewhat early in your career, especially when one considers covid's effects on many career paths.

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Imaginary_Shelter_37 t1_jecd8e7 wrote

I have a friend who is around your age and is a server in a fancy hotel restaurant. She has benefits;i.e., 401k, health and life insurance, and PTO. She lives a low maintenance lifestyle by choice and makes enough to support her lifestyle. Every job has its drawbacks, but she doesn't have the kind of work stress that follows you home. No phone calls or emails after work, no waking up at night stressing over a crisis at work.

If this is what you want to do, I say go for it. The fact that you stayed home for years tell me that you are not a type A highly driven career person. That's not a bad thing and there's nothing wrong with the decision you made as a couple.

You should really take an honest look at yourself and your lifestyle and financial goals. If your desired lifestyle requires a high income, then position yourself for higher income. If your desired lifestyle requires greater happiness in a job/career, then determine if a lower income is sufficient.

Financial considerations would be housing (rent small apartment or buy large house), transportation ( OK with older basic cars vs fancy new car every three years), entertainment (Netflix vs clubbing), travel (road trips vs international travel), retirement (traditional age or early).

Once you consider all these things, you will have a better idea of what income is needed to live your desired lifestyle and you can determine how to proceed.

I know several people who went back to school after 35 and switched careers at 40. You may want to work as a server/bartender for a while until you figure out what you really want.

Edit: hit send too soon.

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Rainbowscarab69 t1_jee131n wrote

AA doesn’t need the MCAT. Look into program prereqs. Make sure your state hires them. I think only 20 or so states do.

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mytemit t1_jeew30z wrote

Never too late. The only thing between you and success is yourself.

If you're interested in software development and enjoy it it can be very rewarding, I'm of a mind that it, like most engineering roles, requires passion ...or maybe better said, simply wanting to know. There is plenty of demand across many industries, being specialized and staying close to the product make a difference.

The other options you're looking out sound viable too, I think the best one is likely the one that interests you the most, concerns about AI causing layoffs or AA positions going away are overblown, when technology and roles change you can ride the wave or it can ride you, just keep swimming. Pick your direction first, then step on the pedal.

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Fedr_Exlr t1_jef8wfe wrote

How about working as an Estimator for a general contractor (especially one that focuses on MEP work). That pays well and would use you technical knowledge gained during your degree and the soft skills you have from bartending. The technical + soft skills is really sought after.

Anecdotally, I have a friend who did Civil engineering, discovered he didn’t like the design work, and then transferred to estimating and found he liked it much more. What you’re saying here sounds a lot like way he was talking before making the switch.

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tossout6363 t1_jegskic wrote

Sounds like a lot of stuff going on there. Sounds like some of your options involve spending more money. I'm not sure it would be a good fit but trade unions are a great option, with elevator and electrical being among the best pay. You can go in dumb as a box of rocks (not that you are), and start earning a decent wage from day 1. It will give you all benefits including some kind of retirement and your training will cost you nothing. At some point it could even, at some point, open doors for you to use your education. While you will start at the bottom, pay increases are decent and steady, required by contract. It was the best decision I ever made.

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