Submitted by batmaninwonderland t3_11dlqla in news
Comments
AccomplishedDrag9882 t1_ja9ev0p wrote
kungfu panda maybe
kslusherplantman t1_ja9jc9q wrote
Let’s not forget sexual harassment panda
overlord7517 t1_ja9mwyg wrote
This is a sad panda indeed
kingsumo_1 t1_ja9oq9e wrote
Would you say a Sad-ition Panda?
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mces97 t1_ja9pa8k wrote
Oh you suck. I just wrote that then saw your comment.
I'm a bad Panda.
mces97 t1_ja9p88w wrote
More like Sexual Harassment Panda.
Escobarhippo t1_ja9qa7j wrote
Dammit now that song is in my head
GusHowsleyESQ t1_jaaev01 wrote
Who lives in the east 'neath the Willow Tree?
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Joealb123 t1_ja9fqfh wrote
Kung Fu Panda gonna get a Felony charge!
MitsyEyedMourning t1_ja9hp5k wrote
Facing the long arm of the paw.
Joealb123 t1_ja9map6 wrote
Love it!
JonasNG t1_jaaqin3 wrote
Oh my God, Panda bear is driving this insurrection, how can this be?
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Itchy-Top t1_jaaq9m6 wrote
I love how the “blue lives matter” crowd hates cops
zuzg t1_ja9kpgx wrote
Ever seen footage of people getting into a panda enclosure? They're not pacifist at all, haha
mces97 t1_ja9pew8 wrote
I mean, bear should be a warning not to do that.
LeicaM6guy t1_jaadelm wrote
Pandas are fucking vicious, sometimes. Thankfully their mating instincts are pretty much flatlined, so I guess that threat was off the board.
I_might_be_weasel t1_jaax09a wrote
Have you seen those cheese commercials? That panda is mad.
tretower424 t1_jaddrln wrote
Indeed…I can’t bear to think about it.
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jayfeather31 t1_ja9ig3j wrote
How is this an actual headline? I feel like I'm losing my mind here!
Imnotlikeothergirlz t1_ja9ldi3 wrote
I'm right there with you. I feel like I need an adult.
soda_cookie t1_ja9n890 wrote
Good luck finding one....
BridgetheDivide t1_ja9r7rs wrote
It's society that's lost its mind. Not you
Krillin113 t1_jabpk3q wrote
Because someone thought it was a good idea to go to a coup attempt wearing this.
Ksh_667 t1_jadii40 wrote
Imagine the thought process involved: : “today I’m going to overthrow our oppressive government in the name of freedom & democracy. Wearing my panda suit.”
Ok-Welder-4816 t1_jaf07an wrote
Obviously it's a thank you to one of their chief sponsors.
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Chippopotanuse t1_ja9jb6u wrote
I love how folks keep dropping dimes on these assholes.
> According to court documents, Mr Rumson was identified by the FBI after receiving a tip and reviewing footage that showed him putting on and taking off the panda mask while on his way to the Capitol, with his face in full view.
And he’s gonna enjoy at least 2 years in federal prison for this stunt:
> The affidavit notes that he later assaulted at least one police officer by "running through the crowd towards the officer, reaching out grabbing the officer's face shield, which forced the officer's head and neck backwards and upwards".
Morat20 t1_ja9y53b wrote
No more guns for him.
Also I love the idea that this dumb fuck spent two years watching others get slowly arrested and charged, hoping he'd get away with it -- and finally having the FBI show up with the receipts and felony charges.
HiMyNameIsNerd t1_jaa2o15 wrote
I'm waiting quietly and patiently for my cousin's time to come. Reported him myself when this all happened.
Edit: LMAO This apparently touched someone's nerve. Thanks for the "concern" ping.
Krillin113 t1_jabpp97 wrote
You’re a good citizen
LiftedPsychedelic t1_jabyk5c wrote
That is honourable 👍
RandomOwlParrot t1_jadxzwd wrote
You did the right thing
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Bad_Faith_Detector t1_jaa7xsu wrote
This just sent a strong wave of fear into the traitors who haven't been caught yet. The guy whose identity was completely hidden has now been caught. Only a matter of time until they arrest the next one.
I love that 2 years on and they are still arresting these dumb fucks. Just when they think they got away with it another arrest gets made public reminding them that they are still being hunted.
dkggpeters t1_jaamxev wrote
They had to wait as Panda hunting season is short and only every two years.
soulsteela t1_jacea3l wrote
The bastard who planted pipe bombs is the arrest I’ve been waiting for.
Ok-Welder-4816 t1_jaf0hwq wrote
How about the ringleader himself?
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602Zoo t1_jae9yh4 wrote
They arrest these people that were whipped up into a frenzy by a former president that stole top secret documents. Why are the regular schmucks the only ones doing prison time? I'm not saying they shouldn't, I'm saying Trump should even moreso than these sheep.
profgray2 t1_ja9d3sa wrote
Wow, another florada man..
Bos_Hog t1_ja9fgse wrote
Florida manda
PirbyKuckett t1_ja9loei wrote
aka Cocaine Bear
KarthusWins t1_ja9tqmr wrote
Bath salt bear
soulsteela t1_jace4o7 wrote
Was going to say would have fit yesterdays sub about good names for cocaine bear sequels.
WhosAGoodDoug t1_ja9h2n0 wrote
He will have to bear the consequences.
Takina_sOldPairTM t1_ja9if8j wrote
Just because the "cause" that he had believed in got him bamboozled...
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zesty_hootenany t1_ja9pvqz wrote
(You missed a nice joke in OP’s comment!)
Takina_sOldPairTM t1_ja9sbna wrote
More like:
you missed a punda-related word on my comment*
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VyrPlan t1_ja9kbvn wrote
of trump's pandaring to the worst of his base
(i'm so sorry)
Imnotlikeothergirlz t1_ja9lb7n wrote
Oh my God please take this poor man's award 🏆
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Room_Temp_Coffee t1_ja9mvqo wrote
Slapbox t1_jaae6hq wrote
Remember just 25 years ago when it was a joke? Good thing the US got its shit together.
And yes, it's been nearly 25 years.
Eeeegah t1_ja9nmjx wrote
I sort of see myself as a guy who keeps up with the news. How is this the first time I'm hearing about a sedition panda? And that photo - oy!
OtterlyRuthless t1_jacdc4t wrote
Same here.
black_flag_4ever t1_ja9hri1 wrote
Charged for a coup as impotent as a real panda.
overlord7517 t1_ja9n65q wrote
Do they provide a bamboo diet in prison?
Aleashed t1_jacb3x2 wrote
Sure, wasn’t there just an article about rectal feeding in US prisons?
earhere t1_jaa4i0i wrote
Wake me up when Trump is cuffed.
CedarWolf t1_jaagnjg wrote
Five years later...
kthxtyler t1_jaa73lw wrote
He’s a saaaaaaaad panda
MR___SLAVE t1_jabwnjf wrote
Who lives in a cell after storming the capital?
Seditious Panda
Maleficent_Ad6021 t1_jaajpgg wrote
Don't be from Florida, Don't be from Florida, Don't be from Florida...
Sigh....
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Ranger176 t1_ja9t5p9 wrote
That makes me a saaad panda (not really)
SweetAndSourShmegma t1_jacxy2d wrote
Crazy sedition...panda 🎵
Prudent-Release9906 t1_jaavbqt wrote
I will bet this guy fought against masks when the pandemic was on.
yobymmij2 t1_jabbuhe wrote
But he was the Pandademic.
blueskies1800 t1_jaa90sn wrote
I am proud of all of those people who were involved in arresting this guy.
uptownjuggler t1_jaas2ay wrote
Look it’s seditious conspiracy panda
thisendup76 t1_jaawy61 wrote
I'm a saaaad panda
47_47_47 t1_jabg73w wrote
The shirt says 天滅中共 or tiān miè Zhōng Gòng (Heaven destroy the CCP). I looked the phrase up online as I hadn't heard it before, and no surprise, these shirts are available from the Epoch Times -- who, as the propaganda wing of Falun Gong, has been extremely supportive of the Trump administration, mostly because he's anti-China (and therefore the CCP?). The panda head must then be some kind of weak commentary on China, but who has any idea what it could be.
hiimsubclavian t1_jadhy0l wrote
It was also a slogan during the Hong Kong protests. If this guy's Falungong he'd probably be wearing 法輪大法好 or some shit.
47_47_47 t1_jaepgja wrote
no, I don't think he's falungong, I think he's been watching too much Epoch Times. Maybe he's a HK supporter but democratic process doesn't seem to be his thing.
Ok-Welder-4816 t1_jaf0wyj wrote
To be fair, the Falun Gong have some legit gripes with the CCP
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Silent_but-deadly t1_jaawxvy wrote
Is that like sexual harassment panda from South Park?
AgencyDelicious1933 t1_jab77cy wrote
A furry Republican. I guess furries really are all accepting /s
🙈 My joke is a bit left field lol
eskieski t1_ja9nte5 wrote
Send it back to China
crisisactorsguild t1_jaa40fo wrote
Hahahaha. Good one.
Afdavis11 t1_ja9t24i wrote
Lots of people look like that!
Low-Possession-4491 t1_jacplm0 wrote
Can we get a Sedition Panda vs Cocaine Bear death match?
five_eight t1_jadgr3s wrote
No shortage of pond scum still on the lam: https://www.fbi.gov/wanted/capitol-violence See if you can spot your kid's coach/bus driver/youth pastor. Please review and share.
ChaoticRoar t1_jabklti wrote
sexual harassment panda from South Park
Narrator2012 t1_jac3dc7 wrote
I like how the January 6th coup attempt (domestic terrorism event that aimed to end democracy in the US) was planned months in advance by Republicans and was only the final part in their otherwise soft "legal" coup attempt in the courts; and yet, media and history will forever recall the event as a "riot".
What other types of riots were planned like this?
Did the BBC or other news writers even watch the Jan6 House Committee hearings at all?
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genis-sage t1_jacdvlw wrote
these headlines keep getting more bizarre lmao the onion could never rn
billpalto t1_jacmouz wrote
"assaulting a police officer"
Hope he likes prison.
Bitter_Director1231 t1_jad1mk4 wrote
What an insult to pandas everywhere.
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CountryOk4176 t1_jabrt4h wrote
China called. They want their Panda back.
BlurryGraph3810 t1_jac40xr wrote
Wait! Is this the cosplay subreddit?
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Tales_Steel t1_jacgrlm wrote
Pandaman is really fucking everywhere
maifee t1_jackbfz wrote
Just imagine rioting Capitol wearing a Panda costume.
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crazypyro23 t1_jadcmua wrote
When one little panda tries to overthrow the government after losing a democratic election, that makes me a sad panda
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Sweaty-Feedback-1482 t1_jacnjfg wrote
I woke up to this news this morning and cried tears of joy. I hugged my children tight and whispered the good news into their ears. They don’t have to be afraid anymore… it is over… ITS OVER!!!!
pegothejerk t1_ja9ddh1 wrote
> In total, prosecutors believe that Mr Rumson spent only about 15 minutes in the Capitol before leaving. Outside, however, footage shows that he encouraged other rioters to "get a ram" to breach another entry point. The affidavit notes that he later assaulted at least one police officer by "running through the crowd towards the officer, reaching out grabbing the officer's face shield, which forced the officer's head and neck backwards and upwards".
That’s decidedly not very panda-like, for shame.