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togocann49 t1_iquxy1j wrote

I’ve found that Dachshunds are rarely accused of having small or light personalities.

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mezmery t1_iqv43ok wrote

they are small tyrants.

so technically...

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StatusSea5409 t1_iqv6t83 wrote

I can only believe it's waiting on owner to walk away, then the tyranny begins.

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Martianman97 t1_iqvtlh8 wrote

I used to work as a postman. Apparently the dog breed that bit postie's the most was Daschshunds

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Lexi_Banner t1_iqvx9qb wrote

I am unsurprised. I groom dogs, and they are among the nastiest when they come in for nail trims. It's both hilarious (because they aren't always particularly mobile), and irritating (because if they can't bite you, they will not hesitate to rage poop/pee on you).

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Kage159 t1_iqxu6cg wrote

Took ours to the vet years ago to get her nails trimmed. She was growling and bearing her teeth at the vet. In one swoop he grabbed her snout and wrapped it with medical tape. He finished the trim, removed the tape and she sat there like nothing happened.

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lucasandrew t1_iqvxvpc wrote

My wife named ours Napoleon for a reason.

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bam2_89 t1_iqw4ysf wrote

I named ny mom's toy poodle Napoleon. You should have named the Dachshund Hitler.

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ecafsub t1_iqvibt5 wrote

They are as loyal as they are feisty. My mom owned several in her life and they were amazing dogs.

One she got shortly before I had knee surgery that laid me up for weeks. This little pup would curl up on my chest and fall asleep. Epic bonding. When I eventually left for college, he slept in my room almost exclusively.

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bam2_89 t1_iqw54wg wrote

When I close the door to my room when I'm working to keep out distractions, my Rottweiler curls up and lays against the door.

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ThousandFingerMan t1_iqviie9 wrote

Dachshunds' reality has very little in common with the real world, because in their world they are the biggest, baddest motherfuckers in the hood

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piccolo1337 t1_iqvmsns wrote

They might not be the biggest physically. But they sure are the most baddest motherfuckers I have trained as dogs. Smart, intelligent, feisty, brutal and will protect «their» person that they have chosen, with their life. In packs Dachshunds are a force to be reckoned with. Unstoppable power.

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SchwiftyTownshin t1_iqvuwgb wrote

This is a dead on description. It's a weird juxtaposition that something can be so cute, yet so intense and brutal at the same time. It's almost like owning 2 dogs in 1 sometimes.

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pyro_in_wonderland t1_iqw5y8m wrote

I'm imagining a guy getting attacked by a group of dachshunds like the dude who got killed by compys in the Lost World.

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SchwiftyTownshin t1_iqwty71 wrote

Lmao I instantly got this visual as well. Hopefully it wouldn’t go down exactly the same…

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grendus t1_iqvy3xd wrote

They were bred to crawl into a wounded badger's nest, drag it out, and murder it.

If you're going to fight a badger, you better be cocky. Nobody who has room in their skull for fear crawls into a badger's den after the thing, even humans dig them up with something pointy.

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togocann49 t1_iqxmqsc wrote

To be fair, when my 16 pound doxie barks, it is a big dog bark. When we would hang on balcony at our old place (2nd floor), he would bark at someone on the ground, they’d often look up, see our guy, then continue to look for that dog that was barking. It’s only if he barks again, or we tell the people in question (so they can relax, there’s no Cujo on the loose) that it was him. He’s also weirded out other dogs with his bark, like other dog knows they are larger, stronger dog, but our guys bark makes them question who’s in charge here

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MumrikDK t1_iqxlqcg wrote

They measure by size of bark rather than mass. Our dachshund basically sounded like a GSD tier dog and acted like that was his power level too.

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thejawa t1_iqvmqfs wrote

While typically the case, I can confirm there is at least one in existence. Ours was bullied by a Chihuahua when she was a young puppy, to the point where the people who got her initially had to give her up. My now wife brought her home to another doxy who was old and mostly blind, and all he did to teach her how to "dog" was dry hump her.

She's 12 now and thought being dry humped was the only way dogs played until we got a new Pomsky puppy a few weeks ago. Seeing our old doxy finally learn how to properly dog from a 12 week old puppy is amazing. But she's still a very timid and submissive little Doxy. The cat still holds a very strong hierarchy over her.

Tax: The Doxy - Pomsky duo in question - https://imgur.com/x6zfjgw.jpg

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Wishilikedhugs t1_iqw02xm wrote

I used to foster dachshunds and I can't overstate how big their personalities were for such tiny dogs. Absolute clowns and ridiculous and then full derp alert at the slightest sound on the street.

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togocann49 t1_iqxq4de wrote

We don’t say we have a guard dog, we say we have an alarm dog, cause if something is skulking about, their onto it, and letting everyone know about it as well. I had a friend, and with his dog barking at passerbys, he’d say thank you, and dog would look proud about it, and bark no more. With our guy in that situation, we tell him to stop, and he’ll always bark once more, while looking right at whomever told him that’s enough (like he’ll stop, but only on his terms)

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CrazeMase t1_iqw4wdb wrote

Dachshunds are the nicest dogs I've ever met, besides golden retrievers Dachshunds are the only dogs I've seen that will smile

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Shadodre t1_iqvrmbi wrote

I had a Dachshund when I was a kid who was the neighborhood bully.

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annies_boobs_feet t1_iqzaleg wrote

my doormat says "dachshund is german for little piece of shit"

and "dachshund" is in the shape of a dach

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Berkamin t1_iqv74lg wrote

This is not fair. I'm a full grown man and this made me squeal. Do puppies know that they are this cute and deliberately do this? This is like having the master key to unlimited treats and cuddles.

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Unsd t1_iqvae3m wrote

When are they supposed to grow out of it? I have two 6 year old dogs that just never stopped being this cute and it hurts me every time I say no when they beg for my food, because they're master manipulators.

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SchwiftyTownshin t1_iqvv9kz wrote

For Dachshunds at least...there is no growing out of it ever. Mine is 10 and I lost hope on this ever happening a couple of years ago, he's so cute it's absolute nonsense.

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horntownbusy t1_iqwlnnz wrote

They cute because they need to be able to convince you to conform your life to fit their personalities. It's the only way.

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Plasma_Cosmo_9977 t1_iqv5wzx wrote

So effin' cute! Are they all like that? I want one.

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TheLastGayFrog t1_iqv7rwc wrote

Dachshund have strong personalities. One common trait, is stubbornness. It can be as adorable as it can be annoying. You just need to know what you’re getting into. :)

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aitk6n t1_iqvr6xk wrote

I have a miniature dachshund. He’s definitely not stubborn and neither is my friends’. Their personalities are huge though! Best dogs in the world imo.

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i_give_you_gum t1_iqvvmvj wrote

One i met always insisted on licking the inside of my mouth like a wolf. Kind of gross.

Wondered if this was common, or just isolated behavior

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Shmalexia t1_iqw4s6w wrote

My Mathilde has been nicknamed Lickitung as she can't stop/won't stop trying to lick our faces especially mouths, while her brother Oliver does this disconcertingly slow lazy lick on our arms.

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MumrikDK t1_iqxmez0 wrote

> while her brother Oliver does this disconcertingly slow lazy lick on our arms.

Sounds like a food test :D

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TreepeltA113 t1_iqw674i wrote

I own a doxie that'll lick the inside of your nose if you don't stop him. He's not allowed to give me more than one kiss at a time because of it.

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horntownbusy t1_iqwm3yb wrote

My little dox knows I hate face kisses and so he will lay across my mouth and rub his face all over my head and in my hair most of the time. He hates getting in trouble so he finds a way to do similar things that don't make me upset (no, I absolutely don't yell at him unless I have to. He just knows "no").

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ValiumandSloths t1_iqxa4ff wrote

My dog does this too when I get home from work, just a smothering of love. I think they want you to smell like them :P that’s my theory

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TheLastGayFrog t1_iqwecw4 wrote

I’m pretty sure that’s more of a dog thing in general. I am no expert though. :)

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i_give_you_gum t1_iqwnqw1 wrote

Sure, but the only time I've seen the behavior was in a documentary about wolves, and this dog, never experienced it otherwise

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prettyfuckingdope t1_iqv8lmj wrote

Dachshunds are incredibly charismatic! My sausage has such a booming personality. Every morning she wakes, she jumps on my neck and cuddles me for approximately seven minutes, before she jumps off the bed and tells me she has to pee. She’s the best. 10/10 would recommend to everyone.

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Plasma_Cosmo_9977 t1_iqv8x9z wrote

I don't know how to say what I'm seeing, like an honest face? I guess that's it, that face is an honest expression.

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prettyfuckingdope t1_iqvaszr wrote

Ahh see that’s thing thing! They would have you believe they’re being honest with their cute eyeballs and their stumpy legs and their long schnoots, but it’s all a ruse so you can have that massive influx of dopamine causing you to feel amazing which also means you feed them every treat ever and then they keep being so darn cute and it’s a vicious cycle which ends in you caving to their every want and need until the end of time.

Again, 10/10 would recommend to everyone.

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ryanvango t1_iqvuh5s wrote

mine is a doxxie lab mix, but he does the same thing. hes only a pup, so he still has a smallish bladder. he sleeps under the blankets, but when its time to get up he does a quick quiet pace around the room, and if i dont get up he climbs on the top of the bed where my head is and just sniffs my ears cause the noise is annoying and it wakes me up. so then if i don't get up, and I roll over, he noses my back so I'll lift the covers for him and he can crawl back under for 20 minutes. but the second my hand touches him, its game on. there's no chance. its a solid 5 minutes of whole-body wiggle cuddles, then some play fighting, then we're off to pee and poop. He loves routine. he won't get in to bed until I've gotten in and tucked myself in, then rearranged the blankets. he knows the precise minute he gets his dinner. and after breakfast he waits patiently at the stairs for my brother's dog to wake up in 20 minutes or so.

love this little monster.

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farshnikord t1_iqvupn0 wrote

My dog KNEW he was cute and would turn it on if he thought he could get treats out of it. The ladies in the office of the old apartment would give treats so he would go into cute mode whenever a young to middle aged lady was nearby.

He would also go through his entire repertoire of tricks he learned when food was on the line, just like impatiently "ok here's sit, speak, roll over, lie down... just gimme the treat already! You got what you wanted!"

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Bluepompf t1_iqv95db wrote

They are breed to hunt badgers They are stubborn, independent and fierce. Also lovely, but you should know what's coming for you.

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grendus t1_iqvz5ch wrote

Exactly this.

Dachshunds are not a good beginner breed because they have the perfect combination of intelligence and stubbornness that makes them require a lot of attention and training to get under control. But once you know what you're doing they're excellent companions, extremely loyal and very friendly. My parents miniature dachshund is an absolute sweetheart, loves the family to death.

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Bluepompf t1_iqw0wfw wrote

My families first dog was a border collie - dachshund mix. Greatest dog ever, incredible personality. But whoever breed them should be in jail. That poor thing had several health issues. She was independent, incredibly smart and manipulative.

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charmsipants t1_iqvf4lp wrote

My parents' sausage saved their lives by warning them of intruders in the house in time for my dad to get his gun. They are great dogs and the bestest of boys and girls. Ours is probably nearing 15 years now and he still keeps us safe.

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horntownbusy t1_iqwmsip wrote

My doxie... and hopefully we'll never need to use this in an emergency... starts to go insane at the smell of smoke of something burning in the house. He always beats the smoke alarm (something boiling over in the oven, etc) because he hates the smoke alarm. But he has learned why the smoke alarm goes off, so he starts barking and running around before it goes off which makes him more effective than it.

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charmsipants t1_iqwnemq wrote

That's amazing! And hopefully you'll never have to have it tested during a real emergency! Give your doxie lots of pets and love, he cares for you! < 3

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MumrikDK t1_iqxmzwl wrote

They're basically a big dog mouth and bark in a portable format.

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EdgarAllanKenpo t1_iqvcxuo wrote

I have had dachshunds all throughout my childhood and my parents even have 2 more currently and I'm in my 30's. I'll get one or 2 after a while.

In my opinion they are the best freaking dogs. Sure they have their quirks like any breed but they are super lovable lap dogs. They love to lay around, they love to cuddle and are very low maintenence.

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mudlark092 t1_iqy4d4d wrote

Something like 1 in 4 get spinal issues as they get older. They are extremely prone to them because of their short legs and long backs, same with corgis although I don't know if the ratio is the same. They can slip a disk and paralyze themselves just from going down the stairs as they get older, thats how ours paralyzed himself at 11.

Running around, going up stairs, jumping onto couches, can all injure their spine because of the added strain.

Wouldn't recommend outside of rescueing one, but especially don't get one if you're not prepared for that potential.

IVDD occurs in 1/5th to 1/4th of them and can cause spinal issues as early as 3 years old.

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Plasma_Cosmo_9977 t1_iqy8bt2 wrote

You know it's crazy this is the only thread for any particular breed I've participated in and it sounds so discouraging to get a little wiener dog. I suppose there are other breeds that can be taxing on an owner but wow I didn't have a clue that dachshunds could be so demanding.

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mudlark092 t1_iqydjc4 wrote

They're a cute and popularized breed, but with any dog that has a very... stylized? structure you're usually gonna run into health issues because of how they look. Whether it's a HUGE dog with lots of skin rolls or a tiny dog with a flat face.

At the end of the day, dogs still need homes! But if you're planning on owning one it's important to know what medical bills you might be paying and how it can effect their life style. Different behavioral and developmental risks should be looked into as well, I know dachshunds can run aggression risks if undersocialized and also might have more exercise and mental stimulation needs than people usually suspect. Ours was quite smart hahaha.

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Rohndogg1 t1_iqx8jp3 wrote

As a dad to a stubborn little shit. Yes they are cute. And HE'S worth it, but I don't think I'd get another 😅

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B_adl_y t1_iqv5344 wrote

How old is this little guy?

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ruralist t1_iqvrsap wrote

Probably around three months. Maybe four.

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paulie07 t1_iqv6x58 wrote

That's cute as shit

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Valkgard t1_iqv9ygo wrote

That gif is older than me

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Maniacal_Bunny t1_iqvpzef wrote

Those eyes!!!!!! This dog could ask for just about anything and I’d do it. No questions asked. 😆

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WeeklyMeat9 t1_iqv8lm7 wrote

Isn't this gif the nicest thing ever?

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Tronkfool t1_iqv6q8j wrote

Yup enough internet for ever I can now die peacefully

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kunk75 t1_iqv99ne wrote

Would love to politely ask how any of you get any…alone time…with your significant others. Crying from the bottom of the stairs behind the gate really doesn’t do a great job of setting the mood

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SchwiftyTownshin t1_iqvwyjp wrote

It's...it's rough ngl. I've been competing with my little dude for 4 years now for snuggle time with my lady and I have been losing decisively. I can't even be mad though, there's no beating that level of cuteness that is a cuddled up dachshund.

For your issue, i'm not above using a "Treat for time" trade off.

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mudlark092 t1_iqy52iq wrote

Was gonna say, start crate training / seperation training early to avoid this. A frozen kong ball goes a long way.

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SchwiftyTownshin t1_iqyk6n6 wrote

Frozen kong was my go to. But yea, early crate training to have them get over separation anxiety is huge. My dachshund was hands down the hardest dog for me to crate and potty train but man it was worth it.

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Sfumatographer t1_iqven07 wrote

How can you not love dogs? Incredibly cute, loving, loyal, smart etc. Great little video!

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CaptainBrant t1_iqvnfom wrote

I don't get the title of this one.

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[deleted] t1_iqxwvlc wrote

Just a guess, but doggo seems to be insisting upon adherence to the agreed upon schedule to sleep for all parties.

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DragonfruitFew5542 t1_iqygsgw wrote

Yep. My dog does the same thing if I don't adhere, with the mock digging and playful attitude.

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[deleted] t1_iqvbs0q wrote

Great eye contact! Pretty pup!

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Beef_Log t1_iqvdzlb wrote

My jaw dropped as soon as their head rested, cutest thing I’ve seen all week:D

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cmilla646 t1_iqvikm0 wrote

I just once want to fall asleep with on of them nuzzled up against me. The cutest neck warmer there ever was!

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UnnoticedShadow t1_iqvnwfi wrote

You literally couldn’t have picked a worse time of day to make the post (4:00 AM for most Americans, 8:00 PM for Australians) but man that is a cute dog.

Realistically only bedtime for some Californians when it was posted though XD.

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Lyrehctoo t1_iqx61tw wrote

I am seeing this at 3pm and immediately thought "you know, I actually could go for a nap right about now"

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Emily5099 t1_iqvs0jo wrote

Oh my goodness, the cuteness is off the charts! I would do nothing but play with them and buy them toys and treats. I wouldn’t get anything else done.

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Minhplumb t1_iqvvhon wrote

This video explains why people have dogs.

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vtangyl t1_iqw3wdg wrote

How I wish my kids would react to this statement.

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DigMeTX t1_iqw9vkh wrote

“I SLEEP NOW!!”

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Not_Larfy t1_iqwdj17 wrote

I've never seen someone make bread so quickly

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LostLaw9417 t1_iqwj7u5 wrote

Give me your free reward or i tell Mr. Wick you have his dog

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Catlore t1_iqwjpep wrote

But I just got up! Ah, well, the Sleep Doxie has spoken. Time for my post-wake-up nap.

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jlnascar t1_iqwph3l wrote

Looks just like my dofg

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Antcorxo22 t1_iqx7i73 wrote

Such a beautiful pupper! 😍

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Chainspike t1_iqxl3wa wrote

Oh the cuteness overload

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[deleted] t1_iqxwh4z wrote

Digadigadigadiga-plop

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isanyofitreal t1_iqy0sbm wrote

Cuteness overload 🥰🥰🥰🥰

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TheDownvoteMasterP t1_iqy2c74 wrote

I have a noodle myself, they can be so sweet. Definitely still a hound though

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