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Ghuriel tried to buy me out, thinking I was desperate until I explained that the callback to Americana generated a feast of pride. Nohriel tried to round up some bikers and burn my place down, but I talked him down and explained that getting kids hooked on sugar early was a cash cow for Greed. All those addictive habits. Theriel thought I was going soft until I showed him the statistics on childhood obesity and Gluttony.

But at the end of the day, when all my brothers in damnation had wandered back to their drug dens and dive bars and politics, in the small hours of the night when I and my modest harem of witches had finished celebrating our own carnal 'witching hour', I can finally admit to myself what I can never say to my fellow demons, something the rest of them forgot when we all fell.

There's more magic in a child's smile than in every soul contract ever written, and the faith and trust those children offer freely is more rewarding than anything Lucifer himself could offer.

Someone has a bit more angel in him than he'd admit

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According to Christian mythology, all demons started as angels.

Even though it REALLY doesn't make sense to punish defectors by putting them in charge of your prison system...

People think demons are all about convincing people to sin and I mean... Yeah, but we also like to sew chaos. I think my brethren are a bit short sighted sometimes. We're all about instant gratification, as a rule, but sometimes playing the long game can be worth so much more.

Think about it. Humans have to eat. When times are hard, its not too hard to give up the occasional vice, but you can't entirely write off eating.

Eating is also a communal experience. The only people who go to a themed restaurant alone are the truly miserable- and everyone else can be made miserable once they get there.

The servers are miserable because they're forced to be on their feet for hours at a time dealing with grouchy customers.

The customers can easily be pushed to misery with poor service. Which in turn makes the servers miserable. Its a perfectly balanced ecosystem of depression and its delicious.

The food isnt half bad either.

Even less to let them roam free in heaven.

The bible says that got put them is a state where they can be free but spiritually blind, it's called "Tartarus" so none of them can see gods purpose or any spiritual light, but they still have their power.

All the suspicious exorcist stuff that happens is one of them.

But it'll end soon.

I always thought of god essentially creating something similar to a self sustaining criminal ecosystem.

Since the denizens of hell are basically locked there anyway without a way out?, why not just put the big boys in there as well? Naturally, they'll form a hierarchy that would dominate over weaker human souls. This serves two purposes

1. The big dogs keep the smaller dogs (humans) in line and maintain the status quo.

2. To make sure the damned human suffer accordingly

This is the same with real life in the criminal world. It is always safer for the law enforcement if few but big entities running operations where they can be more self contained and predictable than having a fractured system where small times go around causing chaos. This is currently the case with the mexican cartels

Felix sensed his attacker before he ever did see him.

It had been a quiet day at the parlour, but then again, the Winter months never were the greatest for business. Checking his watch, Felix exhaled with relief. Almost closing time, he mused to himself, wiping his apron down before moving towards the sink at a lethargic pace. The used scoops in his grip jangled as he rinsed them under running water, and Felix allowed his mind to wander as the drudgery of the task left his body occupied.

As always after a day of work — a long day of sustaining this mortal form — he was too tired for his thoughts to hold any real weight to them. They were simply fleeting impressions; fragments of memories; of that dark, cavernous exp-

Clutching his head, Felix heard the cutlery slip out of his hand and ricochet across the tiled floor. His mind ached, the visages of that vile place piercing into the most intimate crevices of his mind. Focusing on his breathing, Felix scrambled to the front of the building, turning the Open sign over to Closed as sloppily as an alcoholic.

And yet Felix was utterly sober. Sinking to his feet against the wall, it occurred to him that a drink might not be too shabby an idea. In a blaze of visceral pain, Felix felt his horns sprout out of his scalp as he focused on his breathing. His pale complexion made way for a wild vermillion, and in the dim light of a November afternoon, the amber glow of his lambent eyes was more pronounced than ever.

Equally as groggily, Felix stumbled back behind the counter, knocking over a recent delivery of sprinkles in the process. Suffice to say, bundled up upon the floor, he didn't bother to pick it up.

How much longer? Felix pondered, devilish strength beckoning at him. How much longer can I keep this up?

As much as he liked to ignore its existence completely, Felix could always sense it. The Underworld, his very birthplace, calling at him to return. Even now, that pool of insidious power was merely laying dormant as a constant presence. One slip of his will, and that dark might, all of that unfathomable power, at his very fingertips . . .

"No!" He blurted, slapping himself across the chin with enough force to kill a bull. "Not today. Not today . . ."

Once more, at the back of his mind, his senses prickled. How many times? I said no! Felix mentally huffed, only to realise it wasn't the wrath of his past that was latching onto his attention.

Demonic senses were damn near flawless, able to sense danger miles away. Even with the bulk of his strength locked away into that mental prison, he would be able to sense dark intentions even at his slowest.

Something was coming, it dawned on him. Something was coming to kill him.

Tapping into a mere trickle of his power — just enough to reenergise himself, Felix got to his feet, glancing all around him in a bout of paranoia.

Minutes crawled past, and in the meantime, Felix kept his eyes poised on the front door. A silhouette came passing over the blinds of his windows, and soon at its tail, a knock at the door.

Felix mustered up the deepest voice within him. Or, the deepest that wouldn't reveal him as a supernatural entity. "We're closed."

The figure at his doorstep did nothing for several seconds. Right as Felix's tension reached a crescendo, and he began to believe that they may just walk away, his senses screamed at him.

There was a flare of uncontained energy, and Felix had to duck as his storefront was reduced to crumbling rubble. Streaks of fire blazed across boulders of brick and wood, as entire tables were sent scattering. Tapping into supernatural instincts he hadn't been forced to use in decades, Felix grasped a shard of glass before it could pierce his flesh.

Out of the smoke, a cloaked figure sauntered casually forwards. Alarms were blaring someplace off in the distance, and Felix couldn't help but think, as the steel end of a rapier was directed his way, that he should have instated some himself. Oh well, some tiny, distracted part of him supposed, the explosion will probably direct the police anyway.

"I don't suppose you've come for ice cream?" Felix muttered, putting on a brave front.

The figure before him, draped in a white cloak and with a cross dangling across his neck, didn't even crack a smile. In fact, he waved his blade closer, stomping a leg impressively high onto the counter.

"Second-rank, by the smell of you," the hunter considered, "or no! We have a demon general on our hands, huh? Didn't know there were many of you left kicking from the escape."

"I have no idea what you're talking about, Sir." Felix ignored the sharp end threatening to rupture open his throat, "care for a vanilla?"

"Oh don't you start playing innocent, you vermin." The man spat. "Have you forgotten that you're unveiled?"

Taking one glance down at his crimson body, Felix wanted to slap himself. "Look, I don't want to fight. I've been hiding out here for the past thirty years, and have you ever heard of any increased crime-rate? Any unexplained deaths, or missing people?"

"I don't want your plea." The hunter spat. "I'm here to set things right. I don't care about any flimsy excuse you have. Your kind should be locked away in the lowest levels of hell, not mulling about amongst mortals."

"I've changed." Felix pleaded. "Please."

A trickle of blood oozed down his neck. The purple liquid dripped to the counter, amounting there. "Look at the filth that sustains you." The man pointed his other hand at the foul substance. "Look at it."

Such hatred seeped from the man's words. What could spawn such visceral spite?

And then, properly, for the very first time, Felix looked at the man facing him. Saw through his fickle exterior.

"Samuel." Felix croaked, memories surfacing of the day their squadron fought through the layers of hell in a bloody haze. "What are you doing?"

Samuel's false front dispersed into the wind, his crimson flesh and jaded eyes holding the same glint they did all those years ago, as the gates of hell were wrenched open.

"Damn it Felix," he murmured hoarsely, sword replaced by an elongated claw, "must your vision be so keen?"

"Why are you here? Are you trying to draw attention? I'm glad to see you my friend, but two demons together, its too-"

Samuel practically screeched. "What we did was wrong Felix! I've already sent the rest of us back to where we belong. Its just us now." He gazed down, a faraway look in his eyes. "Don't you ever feel guilty Felix? Are you not filled with regret — with shame? We're not like mortals . . . we don't belong here. The destruction the rest of our team have caused in the mortal realm sickens me. We're supposed to punish the evil Felix, not join them."

Felix thought carefully before he spoke. "I do more good here then I ever did down there."

His claw lowered slightly. "How?"

"I bring the people cheer through ice cream. It may sound silly . . . but I've found there's more value in rewarding the good, then chiding the evil."

Samuel donned a mortal appearance once more, though this time, he was no deliverer of heavenly justice. He sported the appearance of a regular, every-day man. "Really?"

Smiling, Felix let stark red expire to a human complexion. "Without a doubt."

Don’t tell that to Australia

"What can I say? I've had my fair share of evil and suffering and I wanted to see some smiles." I was talking to Dave, my old superior, who had dropped in for old times sake and had no idea I had built what I had.

He was still stunned, but finally managed to get some words out. "Can I have some?" I gestured to the menu above the counter. After looking it over, he asked "Do you think I'd like chocolate?"

"I wouldn't know, but it's my personal favorite." Dave handed me the money for a single scoop. I served it up in a waffle cone and let him go at it. He initially tried to bite it, but quickly found that wasn't practical and opted to lick it.

He ate it in something like a minute. "That was amazing! How do you make this stuff?"

"Truthfully, I don't know. Could probably google it. Anyways, how is Jay doing?"

His face darkened. "I was hoping you wouldn't ask that."

Enjoyed this one!

Now me, I went a different route than even that.

I opened this place called Arby's.

The other demons say they wonder why they didn't think of that.

In the original mythology, things got a little bit complex. First and foremost because it was outright stated that like all angels, satan had no free will. When he rebelled, it wasn't his choice to do so. It was so the pantheon that Yahweh was a member of at the time could flex on having their servants beat up another group of servants who couldn't fight back. And yes, the original Hebrew religion was polytheistic just like most other religions of that era and region. It didn't get squashed down into a monotheism until one of the later Hebrew Kings marched into the temple and destroyed the statues of all the other gods except Yahweh. But the point is, that from the start the whole rebellion thing was staged because the gods needed a villain.

If I recall correctly, the king who squashed that the hardest was king josiah

Wow, didn't know that their was anyone else out there that knew this.

That was the other part of it that bothered me. Humans are supposed to be 'special' because we have free will, while other can only obey orders and instinct. That is still true in the modern version, yet somehow, a being without that free will rebelled and is now in punishment (which consists of making others do bad things so they can also be punished?)

An Angel was on my tail, i knew it from the start of the day. They were surely wanting to shut down my business, probably expecting it to be like all the other demons; casinos, bars. But my business was not created of sin, only passion. For ice cream.

This Angel was in for a shock when they would soon come to realise my business was not like any other demon’s.

I wanted to share the delicacy that is flavoured frozen cream to the rest of Queens. It was good business, it seemed to be a fan favourite, and was rather successful. We cared about our customers and their input, we had options for all intolerances and allergies, and plenty of alcoholic ice creams for the adults.

I saw the shock in the Angel’s eyes as they looked up at the sign that hung over the building. Stanley’s Ice-Creamery. I smiled when i heard the little bell ring, and as the Angel walked in, I welcomed them.

“What flavour would you like, dear?”

I do know that, and as fallen angels they usualy deny angelic actions.

Since this one has a genuine love in children, he might be more of an angel than he thinks

P.S. Dear God have I opened a buzzing jar of religous argument

I'm not familiar with the restaurants itself, is it bad or something?

unless its not a prison system but more of a sorting system. you put your defectors in charge of your unwanted byproducts that means nothing to you while keeping the good products up in heaven with your cohorts :D

It's just a common target to make fun of.

Or his talk about a child smile being magic was literal, and he's actually feeding off of their faith and joy as a power source.

Just out of curiosity, have you ever heard of the deadly sin of Gluttony?