In Chapter 2 of the 'NEW DADS HANDBOOK', P.3, paragraph 2, it clearly states: "Upon attaining fatherhood with the birth of a child, the new father is required to divest himself of any & all sporty cars, motorcycles, jet skis, or other items that are used for fun or enjoyment, & must, within 3 months of the child's birth, purchase a station wagon, van, or other vehicle which may be used by the woman of the household!