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Alabussy t1_ityfnjb wrote

An old man visits a lawyer to get his affairs in order.

"So, listen to me," the old man says, "I have several million dollars that my family has been slavering over... but unless my funeral happens in exactly the way that I describe, I want all of it to be set on fire."

The lawyer nods. "That's a pretty standard request. How do you want your funeral to go?"

"I want to be laid out in a glass coffin," replies the old man, "I want to be completely naked, and I want the mortician to give me a rock-hard erection."

"That's certainly an interesting request," says the lawyer. "Can I ask why you want it?"

"Call it insurance," the old man answers. "No matter how the funeral goes, everyone will know that someone fucked up."

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Lord_Diz t1_itys8dg wrote

Help I'm dumb. Someone explain

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AnotherAussie101 t1_ityyigv wrote

If the funeral goes well it’s “the funeral homes fault for the clear coffin” or “it’s the tailors fault for not clothing him” or “it’s the morticians fault for not fixing the dick” …. If the funeral goes poorly…. Well… everyone is going to be blamed for something or other …. My interpretation may or may not be accurate but it’s what I get out of it ….

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AsphaltBeckons t1_itzbg9t wrote

My first thought was that lying on one’s back with an erection might be considered “fucking up”.

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[deleted] t1_ityvbb0 wrote

[deleted]

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OlDirtyBAStart t1_ityxkis wrote

And I submitted the same joke 3 months ago, having stolen it from someone who stole it from someone who stole it from someone.

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[deleted] t1_itz04n5 wrote

[deleted]

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OlDirtyBAStart t1_itz2cjo wrote

So?

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[deleted] t1_itz9rq7 wrote

[deleted]

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OlDirtyBAStart t1_itzgrir wrote

Ah yes the key to all humour, a strict set of rules.

The joke is phrased differently to the one you posted, they don't share a title, so it wouldn't have come up.

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[deleted] t1_iu0hvl3 wrote

[deleted]

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ChurchofPancake t1_itzkqqb wrote

Pretty sure I saw it as an Onion headline at one point, maybe originated there

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Acidic13 t1_ityibp0 wrote

Ugh. This joke is paneful.

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warlock415 t1_itzjqw1 wrote

Ah, a tomb with a view.

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gozlu t1_ityb2zv wrote

Clarly.

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ElfLord01 t1_ityb9wh wrote

Talk about ground breaking

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orangeineer t1_itz2kae wrote

Hell yeah, people will be just dieing to get one.

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theservman t1_itz2w9w wrote

I saw right through this joke.

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Spyce t1_itz796f wrote

Watched the new Munster movie I see

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