Submitted by KarmicComic12334 t3_12549va in Jokes

"there are five crows sitting on a fence and a farmer shoots two,how many are left"

Little billy pipes up, "ain't none, the rest took off."

Teacher says" well, there are still three crows, but i like the way you're thinking."

Little billy says: let me ask you a question, three women are eating ice cream cones. One licks hers, one sucks hers, the other bites hers. Which one is married?

Teacher says: idk little billy, is it the one sucking it?

Little billy says: No, its the one wearing a wedding ring. But i like the way you're thinking.

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jk87jk t1_je2doh5 wrote

Furious, the teacher sends little Johnny to the principal. When he enters the reception area he notices the lady at the front desk is not around. With no one to report to, he takes a seat on the bench outside Mr. Morris' office. Suddenly, the door opens and out walks the receptionist. She pauses, after closing the door, to smooth a wrinkle in her skirt and notices Little Johnny grinning at her.

Surprised, she snaps ‟What are you looking at you little brat?” Little Johnny's grin widens as he points to the corner of his mouth

‟You have got some ice cream on your face.”

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Neriticdialysis71 t1_je2f2af wrote

I first read this as ‟three cows are sitting on a tree branch”, and I was like, this sounds like a fascinating set up

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-WontLoversRevoltNow t1_je3khkh wrote

An elementary school teacher once asked her class “If there are 3 crows on a telephone wire, and a farmer shot one, how many are left?”

One boy said there were 2 but little Sally pointed out “It’s a trick question.  Once you shoot one the rest will fly away” and the teacher congratulated her on her correct answer.

So then little Johnny says “No, there would still be one.  The one the farmer shot.”

The teacher replied “That’s still wrong but I like the way you think.”

So then little Johnny boasted “Okay, I have a riddle for you.  There are 3 women at an ice cream parlor and they each order a single scoop ice cream cone.  The first woman gently licks around the edges, the second woman slowly sucks it from the side and the third woman bites it all the way through it from top to bottom.  Which one is married?”

The teacher thought about it for a moment and said “The woman who bit it all through from top to bottom.”

So little Johnny replied “No, the woman wearing a wedding ring but I like the way you think.”

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timmeh129 t1_je4daxh wrote

this joke has been around for as long as I can remember myself, in different languages. Never really got what the fun part is

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Shevek99 t1_je4tbrt wrote

The answer to the first question is neither zero nor three. It's two (the dead ones). The rest took off.

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No_Cartographer_5212 t1_je5x9hn wrote

Why will the teacher thinks that the marry one is the one sucking? My experience tells me different.

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