Something has gone wrong. And I’m not entirely certain what to do next. I have written here before (1,2,3) and so, I thought perhaps someone here might have some advice, some idea of what to do next. Maybe it is a slim hope, but I have to try. First, I suppose I should explain what led up to this, so you understand.

I cut the engine on the lawnmower and looked over to see how Vincent was getting along trimming the hedges. Hearing the silence, he paused his work and leaned the hedge trimmers against the fence.

“What do you think?”

I squinted up at the lumpy ornamental tree,

“What is it supposed to be?”

“It’s a horse,” he crossed his arms, frowning. “Rearing up, majestically.”

“Why does it have 5 legs?”

“One is the tail.”

“Right… Maybe you should stick to the standard cube and sphere shapes, Vincent.”

He paused to study his handiwork for a moment,

“You might be right. Apparently shaping topiary isn’t one of my skills.”

“Well, we can probably find you a different job to do. Maybe something that suits you better. Which reminds me, I never asked, what did you do before you came here?”

“I was a lawyer.”

“That is going to be helpful,” I rolled my eyes.

“Well, what did you do before? You have a lot of hospitality experience?”

“Oh, I’ve worked at a few hotels,” I shrugged. “Also, restaurants, bars, nightclubs, that sort of thing. I moved around a lot, took jobs where I could get them.”

“What, were you on the run from the law or something?”

“No, nothing like that. I guess I was just… drifting. From place to place, through life. Nowhere I went felt right, you know? Maybe it’s no wonder I eventually ended up here.”

“Do you want to talk about…”

“Maybe you can help with the bookkeeping?” I interrupted, pushing the conversation onward.

“Bookkeeping?” he raised an eyebrow. “This place keeps books? Why? Do people even actually pay? Do we get audited? Pay taxes? In fact, that brings up a more important question: why is any of this necessary? I’ve seen this place generate space and people out of nothing. Why does it need cleaning or maintenance or bookkeeping at all?”

I stared at him for a moment, then laughed,

“Need? Obviously this place doesn’t need us at all. I’m pretty sure they just like fucking with us,” I shrugged. “Sometimes, I go into rooms that no one has been using, or maybe even rooms that didn’t exist yesterday, and find wet towels, chips tracked into the carpet, dirty dishes. Look, just find something to do, don’t worry about why you have to do it. It helps to keep busy, anyway.”

I pushed the lawnmower into the shed and motioned for Vincent to follow, we crossed the now neatly manicured lawn, heading back towards the hotel. As we reached the pool, I saw the Masseur standing out front of the spa, staring at us. I looked away, avoiding eye contact, and made to pass him quickly, but then I heard Vincent gasp and stop in his tracks.

“Jason?”

I turned back, keeping my eyes on the ground.

“Keep walking,” I said softly. “You shouldn’t talk to the permanent staff.”

“No, that’s…” he took a step towards the spa. “Jason, when did you get here?”

I grabbed his arm and pulled him back to the path,

“Whoever you think that is, it isn’t. That’s the Masseur from the spa, and you do not want to follow him. Look away, keep walking.”

He resisted for a moment, but finally relented and followed me inside. Once I was sure we were alone, I turned back to him.

“You alright?”

“That was Jason,” he said softly, still looking back over his shoulder, back the way we had come. “I haven’t seen him since I left. Since he asked me to move out. I… need to go back and talk to him.”

“The permanent staff do that sometimes. They can take different forms. Mostly, you should just try and avoid them. Definitely do not go back.”

“But what if it was really…”

“Vincent, I was standing right next to you. All I saw was the Masseur, same as usual.”

He sank into one of the lobby chairs,

“Why him, though. Of all people?”

“Usually, it is someone tied to why you are here, in some way. Someone important.”

“Yeah, I guess you could say that,” he paused and considered my words for a moment. “Alright, I won’t go back out there, I won’t go find him. Now that I think about it, something was off. He looked like Jason, but he didn’t move like him, you know? I think I just… really wanted to see him again. There are things I need to explain,” he paused, as if he wanted to say more, but then sighed. “It doesn’t matter. We should get back to work. You were going to show me to books, right? Let’s just, focus on that.”

“Alright,” I nodded. “Let’s go to the office.”

I had finished showing him the computer system and was just about to open up the safe when I heard the bell. Vincent stiffened and his head whipped towards the door, it was an uncanny impression of the way a rabbit looks at an oncoming car.

“Guests?” he asked quietly.

“Seems like it.”

“Do you think that is going to be a problem?”

“It’s always a problem. I’m not sure if you noticed, but there are no ‘normal’ guests here. Either way, it’s our job to check them in, so let’s get to it. Remember, customer service smile,” I demonstrated.

Vincent managed to paste on a weak smile and followed me out into the lobby. There were two men at the desk. They were both clearly anxious about something, their eyes darted back and forth like animals being hunted. The taller one on the left had a stain on the cuff of the jacket that looked suspiciously like blood, and the man next to him was pale and sweaty, and he was leaning on the counter for support.

“Good afternoon, gentlemen. Welcome to Ultima Resort. What can I do for you today?”

The taller man stepped forward,

“We need a pair of adjoining rooms,” he spoke more loudly than I was expecting.

“Of course, sir. For how long?”

“It’s… open ended at the moment, will that be a problem?”

“No, we just need a credit card up front.”

As he fished out his wallet, I heard a metallic clink as something hit the lobby floor, but the man didn’t seem to notice. He passed the card to me,

“OK, Mr. Smith, and Mr.…” I prompted them for a name to put on the second room.

“Johnson,” the shorter man mumbled, after a brief hesitation.

“Of course,” I smiled and typed in the obviously fake names. What difference did it make to me? “We’ll see you to your rooms.”

Manny had emerged from the back by then, and he lifted the cases without preamble and headed upstairs. As Mr. Johnson stepped away, I saw the bloody handprint on the desk where he had been leaning on it. I pulled out a rag and wiped it away quickly. As I did, Vincent stepped around the counter and bent down to retrieve something from the floor. When he straightened, he deposited a shell casing on the counter.

“Should we be doing something about this?” he asked.

“About what?”

“About the lunatic with a gun who just checked in with a guy that should be in the hospital?”

“You want to offer him first aid or something?”

“Maybe we should find out if he is a hostage? If the guy with him shot him?”

“It really is better not to get involved,” Manny strolled up to the desk. “No good comes from inserting yourself into the problems of the people here. You just need to stay out of their way and hope they don’t drag you down with them.”

“That Johnson guy was bleeding,” Vincent protested.

“But he seemed more anxious than frightened,” I noted. “He was eager to go off with his friend, and get out from under our prying eyes. I don’t think he is a hostage, I think they are both on the run from something. Something that prevented him from going to a hospital.”

“What makes you say that?”

“It happens a lot here, you get used to it.”

Manny nodded in agreement. Vincent looked like he might try to argue further, but after a moment of massaging his temples, he finally said,

“I just have a bad feeling about this.”

“Yeah, no shit. You don’t need to be a psychic to figure that out.”

Vincent sighed,

“Ok. Well… if no one else has a problem with this, I guess we should get back to work, then.”

“That’s the spirit,” Manny clapped him on the shoulder. “I’ll be in the garden if either of you need me. I was just looking out the window on my way down, and something is really wrong with one of the trees.”

For several days, it looked like Vincent’s prediction was going to be wrong. The two guests holed up in their rooms and I didn’t see hide nor hair of them. They ordered room service for every meal and had it left at the door, they refused all cleaning service, and I never saw them in the halls. They certainly weren’t coming down to use the pool. On the fourth day after their arrival, I headed upstairs in the evening to check on the room, expecting to see the Do Not Disturb sign firmly in place, but I was surprised to find it absent. Maybe they finally wanted clean sheets. I knocked, but no one answered, so I used my key to enter the room. The smell hit me first. The sickly sweet odor of rot and the copper tang of blood mingled into a toxic cloud that filled the room. I flipped on the light fully expecting to find a body, but my first glance didn’t reveal one. Still, the source of the smell was clear enough, the bed sheets and towels were piled on the bed, stained with blood and greenish pus. There were bandages and other first aid supplies piled in the overflowing garbage can. It looked like at least one man, Johnson probably, must be seriously injured and they were clearly trying to deal with it themselves. I checked around the room for any sign of his body, but there was no one, dead or alive, in the room. So, lacking anything better to do, I got to work cleaning up the soiled sheets and towels and replacing them with fresh ones, and opening the windows to air out the room.

Once the heavy cleaning was done, I opened the mini fridge to restock the snacks and ice. I pulled out the ice cube tray and nearly dropped it. Tucked neatly into the tray was one of the largest diamonds I had ever seen, it was the size of the tip of my thumb and was faintly blue in color. I stared at it for a long moment, unsure of what to do next. Then, I heard the sound of the door opening. I shoved the ice tray back into the freezer and spun to find the two guests in the doorway, staring at me.

“You didn’t put the sign on the door, idiot?” Smith barked at his companion.

Johnson was still alive, which actually surprised me a bit, and the way he looked, I guessed it surprised him, too. I had never seen a person look so pale; he was almost green. His eyes were red-rimmed, and his hair was wet with sweat. I was guessing, based on the state of his discarded medical supplies, that he had a serious infection and was probably running a high fever.

“You were supposed to hang it, don’t blame this on me.”

I started to move towards the door,

“I apologize if I intruded, I was just cleaning the room. I will get out of your way.”

Smith produced a gun,

“I would prefer you stay very still.”

I raised my hands,

“Please, I don’t know what this is about.”

“Check the freezer,” Smith barked, waving Johnson forward with the barrel of the gun.

Johnson limped past me and opened the fridge. I heard him pull out the ice cube tray and sigh in relief.

“It’s here.”

The man with the gun relaxed slightly and lowered the weapon,

“We won’t be needing housekeeping for the duration of our stay, don’t come back.”

I nodded and scrambled from the room before he could change his mind. I heard the door slam and lock behind me. As I leaned against the wall, trying to get my knees to stop shaking so I could get back down the stairs, I could hear them arguing through the door.

“I don’t think she saw it. If she had, she would have taken it.”

“You don’t know that. She might be planning to come back for it later. We need to move it tonight,” Smith growled.

“Tonight? We didn’t find a good spot for it, though. Where are we going to put it?”

“We’ll just have to keep looking. We can’t stay here any longer. Even if she didn’t see it, I pulled a gun, she’ll call the cops on us for sure, and if they get here and find us here with the stone…”

“You’re right, we have to hide it, somewhere it can’t be found and can’t be tied to us. Let’s go.”

“Maybe you should rest, and I’ll keep looking. You are in pretty rough shape, Sam.”

“You’d like that, wouldn’t you? Make sure I don’t know where it’s hidden, so you can come back for it without me?”

“The fever is making you paranoid. We’re in this together, I wouldn’t betray you.”

“Right, like you didn’t betray Carl?”

“What happened with Carl wasn’t my fault, I told you. He shot that guard, the guard shot back. There was nothing I could have done to save him.”

“It just seems awfully convenient that you are the only one who got out of there without a new piercing, Steve.”

“You wouldn’t have gotten shot either, if you’d listened to me and stayed down. I wouldn’t have left without you.”

“Sure,” Sam huffed. “Look, we don’t have time for this. We need to find a place to hide it while we wait for the heat to die down, and you aren’t doing it without me, so let’s just get it done. I’ll feel better once it is out of our hands anyway. You know what they say about diamonds cut from the French Blue, right?”

“Come on, you don’t believe in curses, do you?”

I heard the door handle turn and I ducked into the room next door. When I was sure they were gone, I bolted back downstairs. I needed to warn Vincent to stay away from the two new guests, because they were clearly dangerous at the best of times and this place likely only made that worse. If they thought we would turn them in, or that we were after their diamond, they might kill us all. Manny would avoid them as a matter of course, so I didn’t worry too much about him. I sprinted into the dining room to find Vincent sitting at one of the tables, he jumped when he heard me, shoving his phone into his pocket and swiping his sleeve across his face.

“Are you alright?” I asked, collapsing into a chair, distracted for the moment by his obvious distress.

“Yeah, I’m good I just…” he searched for an explanation. “Screw it, I’m obviously not. I saw him again.”

“Who?”

“Jason. The Masseur. Whatever. I was out cleaning the pool. I tried to ignore him, but his eyes… I could feel him staring, feel his anger.”

“Did you talk to him?”

“No, but I wanted to. I wanted to explain, to apologize, to… I don’t know. To make it right? But I can’t make it right, can I?”

“I’m sorry, I don’t know what you mean.”

“Of course you don’t. I never explained. Though, come to think of it, you never asked. Which is odd. Aren’t you curious, how I ended up in a place like this?”

“Manny always says curiosity is dangerous. He thinks it is better never to discuss anything about our pasts, act like everything is normal, like we are just doing a job. I guess it’s just been me and him for so long, I’ve stopped even trying to ask.”

“Do you think it is dangerous?”

“I don’t know. It might be. But it might also be dangerous to bottle it up. Maybe sometimes, there are things that need to be said. So, if there is something you want to get off your chest, I’ll listen.”

“Thanks, I… maybe that will help. Where do I even start? Well, Jason is my fiancé. My ex-fiancé, I suppose. I met him in law school. We were soulmates, the perfect couple. That’s why I proposed last summer. When he said yes, I thought that was it. I had my dream job and my dream man, and my life was going to be perfect. But a few weeks ago, we had a… misunderstanding, of sorts, about money. He kicked me out. He said I broke his trust, that he couldn’t be with me anymore. He ended our engagement. But it was an overreaction, we could have worked things out. We will work things out, once I can apologize, and explain properly. I only used his credit cards because mine were maxed out. It was a temporary thing. I just needed 20k, hardly anything, enough to cover a few bets. They were sure things, no way to lose. And I was going to pay him back, every dollar, as soon as I turned things around. He wasn’t supposed to even notice,” Vincent shook his head, frustrated. “I can still make things right with him. I just need a way to make the money back. If I could pay him back, everything would go back to normal. That’s why it’s so hard to keep seeing him here. Because I feel like if he really was here, if I could just explain…” he trailed off.

I suddenly understood why Manny was so reluctant to talk about this sort of thing. What do you say to that? That money can’t fix every problem? That some things, once broken, can’t ever be repaired? That probably wouldn’t be helpful, so I opted for sympathetic noises and a hand on his arm. There was a long, awkward silence, then finally he turned to me and asked,

“Why did you come running in here, anyway? I thought you were cleaning the rooms upstairs.”

“Oh! I almost forgot!”

I filled him in quickly on what I had witnessed.

“A giant diamond?” his eyes were wide and eager.

“Really, that is what you took away from this?” I raised an eyebrow.

“Do you know how much a diamond that size, and a blue one at that, would be worth? It sounds like it must have been at least 5 carats. That’s hundreds of thousands of dollars, maybe more if it has an interesting history. You weren’t even tempted to just… take it?”

“Of course not. What would I even have to spend it on here?”

“Yeah, but when you get out…”

“I am certainly not going to steal from two men who have already killed at least once for this diamond, are you insane? I told you so you would stay away from them. Besides, they said they were going to find another hiding spot. So don’t even think about it.”

“Still, if we could just…”

“Nope. I am sorry I ever mentioned it. You should stay away from that diamond, Vincent. You are going to get yourself shot, or worse.”

“Worse?”

“They said something about the diamond being cursed. That is was cut from something called the French Blue.”

“The French Blue?!” Vincent exclaimed, loudly enough that I clapped a hand over his mouth.

The thieves could be anywhere right now and if they overheard, I doubted it would end well for us. He pushed my hand away,

“Do you know what the French Blue is?” he asked. I shook my head. “It was owned by Louis the XIV before it was stolen during the French revolution and cut into smaller stones, including the Hope Diamond. It is one of the most famous diamonds in the world.”

“And cursed?”

“There were rumors of a curse. It was supposed to bring misfortune and a painful death to those that owned it. But that is nonsense, you don’t believe in curses, do you?”

“I didn’t until I ended up here. Now, it seems a little but foolish to tempt fate.”

“That is an excellent point, actually.”

“Look, just don’t do anything stupid, Vincent. Money isn’t worth much, trapped in this place. And we don’t have any special privileges as staff, no protection, no immortality. People like us get killed by the guests more often than you would think. Just take my word on it, and do not mess with those guys or their diamond.”

“You are right, of course,” he sighed. “It just seems too perfect…”

Just then, the door swung open, and the two guests strolled into the dining room. They hadn’t taken a meal out of their room since they arrived, so it was a surprise to see them here, and not a pleasant one. Sam limped to a chair and collapsed into it. He was looking very unwell. Steve brought him a glass of water, but when he offered it, Sam slapped it out of his hand, shattering the glass on the floor.

“I’m not touching any food you bring me,” Sam rasped. “You don’t think I know what you are doing? You don’t think I know you’ve been poisoning me this entire time? Pretending to nurse me back to health, but really just making me sicker, and sicker. Then you’ll be the last one left. You want it all to yourself, but you won’t get it.”

“Shut up, Sam. You are talking crazy. No one is trying to kill you.”

“Don’t deny it, I know the truth. But it isn’t your fault, Steve. It isn’t your fault,” his eyes were too bright and his tone frantic as he spoke. “It’s the diamond, you know. It’s the curse. I know, because it told me.”

“There are no diamonds, Sam. You need to drink some water, you are burning up, hallucinating.”

“No, no, no,” Sam grabbed his companion’s shirt, pulling him closer. “This all started with the diamond. With the heist. We stole it, so now we own it, and that means we own the curse. Don’t you see? First Carl died…”

“Carl was stupid, he got caught and he got shot. He didn’t even have the diamond on him.”

“Doesn’t matter. Doesn’t matter. The diamond knew. It knew what we were planning. Then I got shot, and now I am wasting away. You are making sure of it. But that’s a mistake, Steve, because once I die, it will come for you. We need to get rid of it. I thought we could just hide it, but it told me that isn’t enough. We need to get it far away from us, to get free of the curse.”

Steve pulled himself from Sam’s grip and stumbled back, but as he did, Sam raised a hand to reveal the blue diamond, plucked from wherever Steve had secreted it. He held it aloft triumphantly for just a moment, and both Steve and Vincent stared, seeming to be mesmerized by the jewel. Nobody moved for a long moment, and then Sam jumped from his chair and sprinted from the room at a speed it didn’t seem he should be capable of. Without hesitation, Vincent and Steve chased after him. By the time I even realized what was happening and followed out into the lobby, they were nowhere in sight. I hit the button to call Manny.

“What happened?”

I briefly recapped what had led to the three men running off, deeper into the hotel.

“So, what do we do now?”

“I’m not sure there is anything we can do,” Manny shrugged. “They’ll sort it out and come back, or they won’t.”

“That’s very helpful, thank you.”

“I told you not to get too attached. To the guests or to the staff. Odds are they will die, or worse. You need to keep your distance.”

“I’m going to go outside, maybe I can spot them from one of the windows.”

“It’s dark out.”

“That will make it easier to see.”

“Suit yourself, Lucy. I am going to bed, I’m going to finish chopping down that damaged tree tomorrow, when the light is better. Hopefully I will see you in the morning.”

Manny turned and walked off down the staff hallway. I frowned at his back. It irked me most that he was probably right. I shouldn’t try to go after them, I shouldn’t go outside after dark. Nothing that happened was going to be good and I probably didn’t want to see it. But I couldn’t just leave it like this. So, I headed out the back door and into the garden. The pool glittered in the moonlight, lit from within, it was the brightest object in the night. There were also some dim lanterns through the garden paths, and I followed them out, listening for the dogs, as I made my way out to the hedges on the north corner of the hotel, looking up at the windows. The hotel was not in a cooperative mood, evidently, because I checked all 10 windows, but when I went to scan them again, there were 13. I cursed and kept checking, looking for any sign of movement in the panes that were lit up. As I circled, I passed the tree that Vincent had been working on; Manny had been trying to reshape it all week, but it was clearly dead now. The leaves had fallen away, and it had split down the middle, leaving a jagged blade of twisted wood pointing to the sky. I stared at it in the dim light for a long moment, it looked ugly and frightening in the darkness. I shuddered, and looked away, planning to move as far away from it as I could, but then, a shout drew my attention up to the roof, right above me. I could barely make out the 3 silhouettes in the moonlight, but I could hear the man closest to the edge shouting,

“You’ll see. This is what we need to do. To save ourselves, to save everyone.”

The voice was Sam, panting and out of breath, but still manic. Something glittered in his hand.

“Come back from the edge, you idiot,” Steve yelled. “We’ll get you to a doctor. You need help.”

The two silhouettes edged closer to the man on the edge.

“Don’t do anything reckless,” Vincent called out.

“I’m not being reckless. Reckless was trying to steal this cursed stone in the first place. No, now I am setting things right.”

“No!”

I watched as one of the dark shapes lunged towards Sam, just as he pulled his arm back and pitched the glittering shape from the roof into the darkness of the forest. The lunger was too late, they grabbed at Sam, but he jumped away and their momentum carried them to the edge of the roof. For a moment, I thought they might stop in time. They teetered on the edge, arms clawing at the air as though it could stop their fall. But it wasn’t enough, and they slipped, toppling from the roof. I knew what was about to happen. I knew, even as he scrabbled for purchase on the roof, how this would end and I tried to look away, but I couldn’t seem to close my eyes or avert my gaze. All I could do was watch as he landed on the sharp wood of the broken tree in front of me, the wood piercing through his back and erupting from his stomach. The face turned towards me, blood running freely from the nose and mouth. He saw me standing there and feebly reached out a hand,

“Help me,” he whispered. “Please.”

I knew it was Steve. At least, I think I did. But, in that moment, that wasn’t who I saw. And that wasn’t whose hand I was holding when I collapsed, sobbing, to the ground. Rocking back and forth, telling him it was going to be ok. He was going to be alright. When we both knew that he wasn’t. Sam reached the scene first. I didn’t even look up at him, but I heard him when he inspected the body.

“It didn’t work,” he cried. “Getting rid of it wasn’t enough. I have to find it, I have to destroy it, or I’ll die, too.”

He sprinted off into the dark woods that surrounded the resort. I looked up into the vacant, empty eyes of the man impaled on the tree before me. I knew he was dead. And then, the world fell away into darkness. Not like this, not again. It wasn’t fair. It was too much. I couldn’t bear another moment, another second. I couldn’t. I could feel something crack inside me. The whispers flooded into my mind, dozens of voices, maybe hundreds. Saying all the things I had said to myself so many times over the years.

You failed him. You can’t ever take it back. Nothing you do will ever make up for it. They are lying when they say they don’t blame you. They all know it was your fault. You know it was your fault. It will never get better. You can never make it right. All you can do is bear it, until the day you finally die. How much longer is that? Wouldn’t it be better to let go? To rest? Why do you want to keep hurting like this?

And then I felt hands on my shoulders, pulling me up.

“Lucy!”

I opened my eyes to Vincent, shaking me by the shoulders,

“Lucy, are you alright?”

“We need to get back inside,” I managed to gasp.

Vincent helped me back inside the hotel, he looked genuinely worried.

“What happened out there? Are you hurt?”

I shook my head.

“Who is Anthony?”

“What?”

“You were crying and screaming the name ‘Anthony’ over and over. I thought that guy’s name was Steve?”

I wrapped my arms around myself,

“Anthony is my brother. Was my brother,” I replied softly. “I… I can’t talk about this right now. We need to get to our rooms; it is too late to be out like this.”

“Are you sure you are…”

“I’m fine,” I cut him off. “We’ll talk in the morning.”

Vincent insisted on walking me to my door. He wanted to make sure I was safe. I don’t know how to tell him I’m not. That I am not sure I ever will be again. I’m too afraid to sleep, so I am sitting here, writing this, trying to distract myself. It is hard to focus, though. Because the truth is, I’m not ok. Something broke in me tonight. And I think it opened me up to something, like a gap in a door letting in the cold breeze. The whispers haven’t stopped. They never stop. I can hear them, even now, chewing at the back of my mind like rodents. They are trying to get in, to take over. How long can I ignore them, resist them, now that they are in my head? So, I guess now we get to the advice I am hoping for. On the off chance anyone here has experience in this sort of thing, do you know how to make the whispers stop? How do you push the demons out of your head, once they already have a foothold? There has to be a way to fix this. I hope. If anyone has any ideas, I am open to trying them. For now, I am just going to distract myself with work, and maybe it will get better with time. I will write again if I can.

Lucy