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Make_the_music_stop t1_j5g13zl wrote

The Mafia have decided to get into online crime to keep upto date. They have just launched a new App called Pay-Up-Pal.

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emzirek t1_j5hs7rx wrote

hey pal, I ain't your friend...

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ushdiavc6eb74 t1_j5hsnjp wrote

i ain't your pal, buddy

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redactedforprivilege t1_j5hu463 wrote

i ain't your buddy, guy

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Marquar234 t1_j5hvxkf wrote

And my axe!

Edit: I may have done this wrong...

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emzirek t1_j5ivy0h wrote

no, it's "careful with that axe Eugene"

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Ethereal_burn t1_j5i7vwj wrote

I ain’t your guy, bro

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[deleted] t1_j5gv8tf wrote

It's actually called Fuck You, Pay Me!

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holtpj t1_j5h9pug wrote

That's Childish Gambino's app. /s

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[deleted] t1_j5hf3o7 wrote

Wow! A lot of GoodFellas haters out here.

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cantbenotrandom t1_j5fomqw wrote

Oh the darkness of this joke

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kunell t1_j5hhf8i wrote

Yeah cuz theyre walking through the woods at night. Its pretty dark in the woods at night.

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CrustyCrumpet69420 t1_j5hnk23 wrote

This isn’t that dark. The first time I heard this joke it started with “A 45 year old man and a 12 year old boy are walking in the woods”

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Nemboss t1_j5j2l1e wrote

But how could a 12 year old lead a grown man into the woods and kill him?

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raging_bill t1_j5frgna wrote

I immediately thought of Chrissy and Paulie Walnuts trudging through the snow looking for the crazy KGB guy.

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n9077911 t1_j5h4lar wrote

Without a doubt the funniest episode.

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elephaaaant t1_j5j1j84 wrote

For me, Ade and Silvio came to mind first. Sadness.

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Latercoyote932 t1_j5kjm07 wrote

“Chris has been in an accident, everything gonna be fine, sly’s gonna pick you up and take you to the hospital”

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DarkPasta t1_j5fp79g wrote

I first heard this but with an old man and a kid.

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KoalaKazoo t1_j5howwf wrote

Is it the boy, or the old man who will have to walk alone in that version?

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florinandrei t1_j5ioydq wrote

According to the Mass Effect trilogy, they will still have a version of this joke even in 2185 AD. Except it's about two alien races.

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Glorx t1_j5iv92n wrote

A krogan and a salarian during the rachni war.

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dontbelikeyou t1_j5yia9m wrote

I first heard it that way too. I prefer the mafia version.

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pinuspicea t1_j5gnm90 wrote

"Don't worry; we're in this together. After all, I've got your back, and you've got a price on yours."

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Haploid-life t1_j5fovst wrote

Then the first guy shit his pants.

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Hugh_Jazz_420 t1_j5iop48 wrote

Says he was an interior decorator. His place looked like shit.

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alemakata t1_j5hxwdl wrote

isnt this from Blue Valentine ?

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Artybait t1_j5i0rcy wrote

Lmao great joke

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LadeeAlana t1_j5ipqro wrote

A couple of made Mafia guys are doing some work with a relative of the late Dr. Kevorkian.

They're trying to come up with a "Make-it-look-like-a-suicide" machine.

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LimeSkye t1_j5j0tzp wrote

I prefer this joke when the second guy is a clown. :D

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footlivin69 t1_j5myb6o wrote

“Yo…you talkin’ t’me?”

1