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peter_the_martian t1_je5i7kj wrote

My girlfriend is really a hands-on type of gal.

In fact, she is a hand. I call her Rosie Palmer. She’s always there for me

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palebluedotcitizen t1_je5haeb wrote

My wife and I are bisexual, when I want sex she makes me buy it.

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torlamite t1_je6glo8 wrote

I hear this in Rodney Dangerfield's voice and mean that as a compliment

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Zadok47 t1_je53v13 wrote

Be thankful you're still having it.

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