I know, poor OP. I don't know how they managed to be so descriptive through the terror. Most people would have a heart attack.

The husband sees it as a baby. They'll be no convincing him. Plus I think a man is more likely to physically defend himself from danger than I am. I've tested my physical strength against men I trust before. The difference is laughable, and pretty unfair. Maybe I'm particularly weak but I'm 5'8.5" and 165 lbs and still fit enough, so I have to be stronger than most woman who are 5'1 and 95 lbs. If he wants to stay with the obviously demon baby, I'd let him. I mean for OP. I'd probably like a demon baby personally, if it was the right kind of demon.

My first picture with my daughter I'm making a grimace, I couldn't even force a smile. She was weird looking till they cleaned her up. She was so loud too. It made me distressed though I was lucky to think myself through it and realized it's not abnormal to not be that excited those first days. But many women may get sent into a downward spiral by thinking they are bad for having such feelings. Women need to be told it's ok if you don't have a heavenly experience when you first see your child. Maybe that would save at least a few from depression.

That's what I was thinking too. I was scared of my baby when she was born. Nothing like this and I didn't have postpartum depression or anything, but I definitely didn't have an angelic moment and wasn't that thrilled.

More women need to be told it's not wrong to not cry and instantly fall in love with baby. Too many tell those fantasy stories of love at first sight and it can make a young mother feel like something is wrong. I was induced and I've heard that the pitocin can interfere with your natural oxytocin, the love hormone.

When I saw her first she was grey and ugly. I did not have a happy face. The first picture of me holding her I look like I'm fighting a grimace and trying very hard to smile but was unable to succeed. She was cute once they cleaned her and brought her back wrapped up, which pleased me, but she screeched like a baby goat or pig which disturbed me. I was fine letting the nursery keep her over night and when friends came to visit I was fine with them holding her for 2 hours. Didn't think I would be but I was. I was scared that I had created human life. Responsible for this person for as long as they live.

When I had a moment alone with her it began to pass. I didn't let these feelings overcome me and assumed many women experience them but just keep silent. I tell women it can happen and hopefully for most it passes. This needs to be common knowledge though. I wonder how many of the ladies that say they burst into tears of joy are actually lying?

My daughter is almost 16 now. I've told her about this. I made it sound nicer though. More that of a, "I was overwhelmed by the realization that I'd created life and fear of my capacity to be the mother she deserves" sorta thing so she wouldn't think something was wrong with her. All babies are ugly when they first come out. She was pretty cute cleaned up. I knew what they were supposed to look like but it was still such a terrible shock and she cried and then we had trouble nursing for a bit and my legs swelled up so much I could barely get the shoes and maternity pants I came in with on which upset me cause I've always been naturally thin. It was alot to deal with and we didn't even have anything serious go wrong.

Well, your sister was a child also so she didn't deserve it. Maybe she was an asshole sometimes but siblings often are.

Or hire women. Are women susceptible to siren song? What about gay men? Could be worth a try.

Well yeah. It's one thing if someone just doesn't want you anymore BEFORE you've given them everything. That's fine, you let them go and wish them luck. But if you've given them everything, the best years of your life, while they mistreat you, you can't let them get away with ditching you with nothing and going and and learning from their mistakes with you by being awesome to someone else who just showed up out of the blue. That can't be tolerated. Some wall woman doesn't deserve everything good that OP has earned right?

Yep.

Leaving is better than staying regardless. They can hear you either way.

"Under blue moon, I saw you So soon you'll take me Up in your arms, too late to beg you Or cancel it, though I know it must be The killing time Unwillingly mine

Fate Up against your will Through the thick and thin He will wait until You give yourself to him

In starlit nights, I saw you So cruelly, you kissed me Your lips, a magic world Your sky, all hung with jewels The killing moon Will come too soon"

Your story and mother's last song made me think of the Killing Moon by Echo and the Bunnymen. One of my favorite songs. Was your mother's invisible visitor Death? Why would she want him to visit you? Hopefully it's something or someone whose visit will be less permanent. Terrifying either way.

Seems like Clem should belong to a cat person. A really crazy cat person. Someone who always wanted an evil cat army.

Miffy was a calico. Male calicos which are insanely rare are basically always sterile. Unless being a demon in cat form makes a difference.....

Maybe OP is like me and doesn't want or need any friends ar this point. Even though they are halfway across the country and we almost never see each other my friends I had as a kid are the best and have given me more love than I will ever need.

“I never had any friends later on like the ones I had when I was twelve. Jesus, does anyone?”

Some people don't eat meat because they don't like it or health reasons. I'm not vegan, I've been vegetarian and am pescatarian now(will eat fish and seafood) because I don't care for meat. If I get a weird bit of fat or gristle it turns me off eating for the entire day. Can't do it. Seafood seems to have less feelings than mammals in my mind as well. I'm not against meat. Animals would eat us as well. It's natural to eat meat. But factory slaughterhouses are vile places. So too egg and dairy. I think people should eat less of these things so the animals can have better conditions. That's what needs to change, not so much the act of eating meat, just better treatment for living beings.

Exactly. If William has always been a good husband, she probably has time and needs to be careful about this. Protecting the kids comes first. Maybe planning an escape to a foreign country that won't send them back if found would be an option. Maybe David can help from beyond the grave. Hopefully she has someone truly trustworthy to confide in that won't tell anyone else. I have friends like that and family so I'm hoping OP has someone also who won't tell anyone else.

They didn't hook up till way later. Probably more an overall jealousy of David than just to be with her, though I'm sure she was part of it. He was probably jealous of many things in David's life.

All burgers are a corpse unless it's gardenburger.

My best friend had an uncle work in a slaughterhouse and she said he said if someone lost a finger or hand, they did not throw away the meat. If it went through the grinder, it got packed with everything else. Now we were 12 or 13 at the time but I did and do trust her fully. I'd trust her with my ss#, bank account password, everything personal. I don't think she was joking that time.

You knew what was happening and you didn't go sleep somewhere away from your boyfriend? I think that's called murder, regardless of the fact you were asleep. You knew what was going on and how to prevent it.

Why was Jessica even in there? What she did was good. I'd call that doing the lord's work, if I believed in god. She was 110% in the right.

Well maybe we could put him to good use by sending him out to haunt men planning to kill their wives or something. Kinda like a social worker! Like those guys in Beetlejuice that had to become public servants because they commited suicide.

I'll take you but we need to exorcise your fiance. I not a fan of men at the best of times(despite being "happily" married for 20 years, hahaha) but I REALLY hate ones like yours. We gotta send him to hell girl. Too bad I couldn't help you before hand. I know how to get abortion pills safely and cheaply from abroad. You might still be alive if we had met earlier.

You can make fun of someone for anything. Nothing is untouchable.....if they messed with you first. The weed thing who cares, UNLESS the girl talks shit about other people who do, like thinking poor people who do are scum or untrustworthy or if her father is like a politician that makes law that jail people poor people for smoking a joint. Then she deserves being blasted for it. Plastic surgery girl would deserve if she's equally a bitch about such things.

It's kinda like pro-lifers who protest outside clinics but yet that have had an abortion because "THEIR situation is different". Those women deserve to be tormented by everyone for it.

Vampire's are no more monstrous than any other creature. Do you find bears monstrous? Dogs? Cats? Humans? Humans kill every day. Even you do. The food you eat, how do you know for sure that cow doesn't understand awareness of its life, that it desperately doesn't want to die? Humans kill other humans as well. The Vampire is only doing it for survival. And Vampires at least, are capable of determining if their food actually deserves to die or not. I know lots of men who deserve to die. Plus, I'm sure some don't need to be killed. I'm sure it would be possible to get a pint of blood from a willing person quite often as well, either by paying them or from someone with interests in such things. I can't believe what a terrible son you are honestly. People who so desperately wish to fit in always are, terrible that is.

Being too clean is bad. You have no natural defenses to germs or bacteria if you constantly sit in a sterile environment. I just do normal cleaning. Nothing fancy or extreme. Me and my kid have never been sick except like allergies and winter colds and stuff. I'll eat food I've left out of the fridge for 24 hours. Even seafood takeout from restaurants. Never ever have I ever had food poisoning. My husband is weird and won't eat anything out longer than an hour or two and he get stomach illnesses like mild food poisoning often. He always tried to throw my takeout away if I didn't put it up cause it's usually shrimp or fish, but I had to break him of it. I still planned to eat it. Never even got an upset stomach. I'm telling you you need a little germs and dirt to be able to fight the bad stuff.